The happiest woman who understands her husband

Chapter 14 Positive Body Language vs. Negative Body Language
positive body language
Body language, like vocal language, can also be divided into positive affirmation and negative negation.

Now, let's look at positive feelings.Most expressions of happiness are easy to recognize, but these nonverbal signals can be suppressed or hidden for a variety of reasons.For example, in the process of playing poker, even if we have a good hand, we don't want to be complacent, just like we don't want to let our colleagues know that we have won more bonuses than others.Sometimes, there's really nothing to see from the face, but a keen observer will use supporting evidence, such as non-verbal information from the feet, to discern a person's true emotions.

A sense of visceral, uninhibited well-being spills over the face and neck.The stretching of the wrinkles on the forehead, the relaxation of the muscles at the corners of the mouth, the full presentation of the lips (without squeezing or closing the lips), and the dilation of the eye area due to the relaxation of the surrounding muscles are all signals of positive emotions.For example, when people feel relaxed and comfortable, the facial muscles relax and the head tilts to one side, revealing the most vulnerable part of the body, the neck.This is a high-comfort natural response that cannot be mimicked in states of discomfort, tension, doubt, or threat.Just imagine, when riding in an elevator with a group of strangers, trying to tilt your head to one side and keep doing that for the duration of the elevator ride is a difficult task for most people.

When a man narrows his eyes suddenly, it means that he has doubts in some aspect and is doing ideological struggle.You know, when a person is restrained, he not only squints his eyes, but also makes a fuss about his eyebrows.Arched brows are associated with high confidence and positive feelings (a defying gravity behavior), while lowered eyebrows are often associated with low confidence and negative feelings.Studies have shown that inmates look for this confused, lowered-brow expression on the faces of new inmates to gauge which ones are weak or disturbed.

There are many eye behaviors that express positive emotions.As children, our eyes show a sense of comfort when we see our mom.For the first 72 hours after birth, a child's eyes follow their mother.When the mother enters the room, the child's eyes widen to show interest and contentment.Likewise, loving mothers keep their eyes open.At this time, the child will always look into the mother's eyes, so as to get some comfort from it.Open eyes send a positive signal that the person is observing someone or something that makes her feel comfortable.

Pupil dilation expresses a sense of contentment, or some other positive emotion.In this case, it is as if the brain is saying, "I like what I see now, let me see more clearly." When men are genuinely happy to see someone or something, their pupils dilate , the eyebrows will be raised (or arched), and the eyes will be widened, making them appear larger.

Below, we've listed some recognized body language that expresses positive affirmation and how it looks.

1. to express approval, consent

Even without saying "yes," there are a few gestures you can consciously make to say "yes," most of which involve the head or hands.

Most of us would nod our heads in agreement.In conversation, however, what a nod means depends on how it's done: a brief nod often means "I agree"; when you're talking, his nod now and then often shows that he's listening patiently.

As with nodding from time to time, if he smiles at you while he's talking, it's encouraging you to keep talking.Generally speaking, laughing is a positive and affirmative gesture, which can convey the meaning of welcome, happiness, agreement, and appreciation. The specific information mainly depends on the way of laughing.

In addition, imitation is also a common body language used to express consent.Deliberately mimicking your posture, gestures, and movements can help your points of view come together in a friendly way.If you're talking, you may unconsciously mimic each other's gestures, showing that you agree on what you're discussing.Here are some moves people might imitate: shifting weight from one foot to the other, resting elbows on the bar, holding a glass with both hands, uncrossing arms or legs, Cross your legs, spread your hands out, put one hand on your crotch...Of course, experienced imitators may express the same message in different ways, which is also called changing the soup without changing the medicine.

2. To express encouragement, motivation, or confidence
People subconsciously use certain gestures and actions to express "everything is fine" or "everything will be fine", such as the "OK" gesture, the thumbs up, and the "V" gesture for victory.

3. to express admiration, appreciation

There are many poses that express appreciation for a woman's charm.Like twirling an imaginary mustache, an Italian gesture of admiration for a woman.Or pull down the lower eyelid with your index finger, which in parts of South America means "she is a beautiful woman with bright eyes."The most vivid one is the gesture of facing the palms together to depict the shape of an hourglass, which is a widely used way to symbolize the graceful figure of a woman, indicating that the woman has a curvy, beautiful and moving figure.Furthermore, the quintessentially French gesture of kissing the fingertips is often used to compliment the charm of a woman or a particularly delicate dish.

4. Show interest unconsciously
Most of the gestures described above are intentional.However, if a man shows the following actions and postures, he may be unconsciously expressing the meaning of "I am very interested".

If a guy is interested in what you have to say, his head posture can also show what he's really thinking.When a man is neither bored nor excited, his head may be evenly tilted; when a man is interested in what the other person has to say, his head may tilt slightly to one side.Assessments can also be represented by combined hand and head gestures.When a man is interested in what the other person has said, and is weighing what he has heard, he may bring his hand up to his cheek, index finger and thumb up, and the rest of his fingers tucked into his palm.

When a man is concentrating on drawing, sketching, or doing some other delicate work, he may stick his tongue out, or stick it out against the side of his mouth.Sometimes, he doesn't even realize he's doing it.In this context, a person sticking out his tongue could mean a modest rejection, because he doesn't want to be interrupted by you to concentrate on the task at hand.

Eyes and eyelids also speak, and when a man has a strong interest in a person, object, or thing, the eyes give it all away—and their owners may want to hide their concerns.Pupils are moderately sized when the man shows only moderate interest in normal light and circumstances.In dim light, or when a man sees something exciting, the pupils dilate.This can happen when a man sees an attractive member of the opposite sex, or when someone plays poker with a good hand.And men blinked faster when they saw something very attractive.

negative body language
All kinds of negative emotions of men, including unhappiness, disgust, disgust, fear and anger, etc., can be expressed on the face.These emotions can be stressful, so we can spot them through cues: twitching of the jaw muscles, flaring of the nose, squinting of the eyes, quivering of the mouth, or pursing of the lips (as if the lips were gone).If you can observe further, you will also find that when a man is nervous, his gaze focus is locked, his neck is stiff, and his head does not tilt at all.He may say he's not nervous, but these cues in him can indicate that his brain may be processing some negative emotional issues.

These non-verbal signals come on when a man is upset, and they can be obvious, vague and fleeting, and last a few minutes or longer.Sometimes they happen subtly, sometimes they're cryptic, and sometimes they're just ignored.

Men often speak sweet words, but their faces show all kinds of negative non-verbal signals, so we have to remember that men often hide their emotions, and they cannot find these clues without careful observation.Plus, facial cues can be fleeting, especially what we call subtle gestures, which can be hard to spot.In a casual conversation, these subtle behaviors may not mean much, but in an important interpersonal exchange (be it a lover, a parent and a child, a business partner, or a job interview), these seemingly insignificant tensions The signal is likely to reflect a deeper emotional conflict.

Since the human conscious brain may try to demonstrate its own peripheral emotions, we should seize any signals that reach the surface, because they are likely to reflect a person's deepest thoughts and intentions, which usually have a high the accuracy.Below are some typical negative body language and its specific manifestations.

1. have no interest, dull interest

If a man's pupils are slowly shrinking unconsciously, it may be because he is not interested in his current situation or the people he is involved with.And a man's seemingly relaxed posture can also betray his indifference, such as sitting leisurely, looking nonchalant, with one leg dangling from the arm of the chair.

When you are talking to a man, if he is not paying attention to what you are saying, he will either glance away and spend less time looking at you than looking in other directions; The head is constantly turned from the speaker to other places; or one side of the mouth will be raised in response to your words and comments, showing an asymmetrical "bad smile".

2. Boredom and boredom

When a man sits bored by a boring conversation or a dull TV show, he will adopt telltale postures that reveal his true feelings and emotions.Such as turning the head to one side from time to time, or supporting the head with the hands, the body becomes more and more bent; the head is fully supported by one hand; the body is leaned back; the legs are fully extended; So bored, the body may lean forward; if extremely bored, he may close his eyes, or hang his head.

In addition, the two hands are clasped together, and the thumbs subconsciously circle each other; or the backs of the fingers stroke the cheeks back and forth, as if feeling the stubble on the face; or measure the imaginary beard, thereby Suggesting that the speaker has been babbling long enough to grow a long beard; or pointing the fingers of a hand down with the thumb toward the body, indicating that someone's talk is giving them indigestion... These are quite characteristic and The vivid body postures and movements are silently telling boredom and boredom.

3. Impatient
Impatientness often manifests itself through fidgeting or fondling movements involving the fingers, thighs, or feet.While sitting, a man may tap his fingers on the arm of a table or chair in rapid succession to indicate his impatience.And when he is standing, he may open his hand and pat the outside of his thigh repeatedly.If the impatient man is sitting cross-legged, he may be dangling the dangling foot.

4. Say "no"

Men have many "no" gestures, many more than we think.

The most familiar one is shaking his head.Turning your head from side to side, this way of saying "no" originated in infancy, when babies don't want to continue to feed, they will turn their heads to one side, avoiding the mother's breast, this position exists all over the world .

Ranked second is shaking hands.With one hand raised, palm facing outward, shake quickly from side to side.While making this gesture, there is no smile on the man's face and he may shake his head accordingly.In the "exaggerated" version of this pose, the hands are folded, palms facing outward, in front of the chest.

5. Hidden Disapproval
When a man disagrees with your point of view, but it is not convenient to say it, he may instead express this negative emotion and feeling with silence or actions that seem irrelevant and meaningless to the matter at hand.

When a man disapproves or disagrees, he may gently tear at the garment, as if to remove tiny threads.The person picking the thread may be staring at the floor instead of at the speaker.These little gestures revealed many unspoken objections and reasons he harbored.

A man who is critical or dissatisfied is likely to lower his head when he is a listener. This seemingly inadvertent gesture shows that he, as a listener, does not like or agree with what the speaker is saying. what to say.

When a man is sitting bored, he may frequently rub his eyes or pull his eyelids.Arguably, these disaffected gestures give the brain feedback that reinforces and prolongs the emotional state of being critical and dissatisfied.

If the dissatisfied man is seated, he is likely to assume what is known as a "closed posture"—arms crossed, legs crossed, body held erect.

6. Rejection and Objection

At a meeting or party, if a man is annoyed by someone he's trying to avoid, he's likely to give more obvious signs of rejection than just a lack of interest.Be aware that you may be receiving rejection and disapproval as soon as you see a man make any of the following actions and gestures: deadpan; fake or real yawns; scowling, pouting, or sniffing; Staring at a point in the middle of the distance so that the other person cannot meet his eyes and make it difficult to continue the conversation; rattling; shaking head in disgust, or openly disagreeing; turning sideways, turning head to one side; turning away...

7. Sharing Negative Information
When two men want to share negative information or negative opinions about someone, they often use gestures and movements that don't let the other person know what they're talking about.They use different gestures to suggest collusion with another person, to suspect or contempt another person, and to make demeaning or insulting comments.

The most widely used is the wink of one eye to show that they both know a secret (or trick).

Gently pressing the side of the nose with the index finger means "keep quiet and keep quiet - only the two of us know about it".As with the wink, the gesture doesn't necessarily mean that the secret two people are sharing is nefarious, it could be a hilarious trick.

Tap the side of the nose with the index finger. This action is to remind the other person that someone is nosy and asks questions.

And rolling the eyes, revealing most of the whites, and raising the eyebrows means silently asking: "Will you believe this?" Or, when a forgetful person repeats that anecdote he has told a thousand times Anecdotally, this action means "oh look, he's started again..."

(End of this chapter)