no-complaint marriage

Chapter 32 Growing up in the Dilemma of Marriage (1)
1. Difficulties are experts in testing marriage

There may be no vows between husband and wife, no grandeur, but they must support each other and hold hands silently. When the autumn wind blows by, hold hands and grow old together.Because the love between husband and wife is the kind of noble, pure, selfless, great, and admirable love that the heart is bound by love, and love comes from the heart.

There is a kind of emotion called being tight-lipped

When a family encounters an unexpected disaster, most people will instinctively find someone to take responsibility.Chances are your partner shares your attitude in this situation.When couples work together to deal with problems outside of marriage, it often improves the relationship between two people.For example, when one of two people is suddenly seriously ill, they don't regard the illness as their own business, but regard it as an enemy that the two should work together to resist. good medicine.

The man is unemployed.He didn't tell the woman.

He still leaves and comes home on time.He did not forget to make up some stories to deceive women.He said that the new director is very kind, and the new female college student is quite pure... The woman pinched his ears and said with a smile, "Be careful." He was walking out at that time, and the woman grabbed him to help him Trim the cuffs of your shirt.

The man packed his briefcase, squeezed onto the bus, and got off after three stops.He sat down on a bench in the park, looking sadly at the flocks of pigeons in the square.In the evening, the man returned home with a smile on his face.He knocked on the door and shouted, "I'm back!"

The man persisted like this for 5 days.

Five days later, he found a short-term job in a small cement factory.

The environment there was harsh, and the flying dust kept his throat dry.The labor intensity was very high, and he was sweating from exhaustion when working.The team leader said: "Don't do it, your body is not good enough." The man said: "I can." He gritted his teeth and shook his legs lightly.The man's body was covered with thick dust, like a living clay sculpture.

After work, the man took a quick shower in the factory, put on a neat suit, and went home relaxed.He knocked on the door and shouted: "I'm back!" The woman ran to open the door.The smell of chopped green onions in the house makes men feel at ease.

At the dinner table, the woman asked him: "Is the job going well?" He said, "It's going well, the new female college student is quite pure." The woman was angry, but gave the man a chopstick and fungus.The woman said: "The water is boiling, do you want to take a shower?" The man said: "I have washed, I came back from the sauna with my colleagues." The woman hummed softly and began to clean up the dishes.The man thought: It's so dangerous, I was almost seen through.The tired man hurriedly washed his face and brushed his teeth, then fell asleep.

The man worked in that cement factory for more than 20 days.It's almost the end of the month, and he doesn't know if that poor salary can fool a woman.After dinner that day, the woman suddenly said: "Don't work for that company, I know there is a company that is recruiting, I have inquired for you, and you meet all the requirements, try it tomorrow?" The man burst into ecstasy, but said: " Why do you want to change?" The woman said: "Isn't it good to change the environment? Besides, this company pays very well." So the next day, the man applied for the job and was successfully admitted.

That day, the man cooked a lot of food and drank a lot of wine.

He knew that all this could not be hidden from the woman.Maybe the woman knew the truth from the day he went to work in the cement factory, or from the day he lost his job.Was it his dodgy eyes that betrayed him?Had his tired body betrayed him?Was it the woman who saw him get on the bus going in the opposite direction from the window?Or is his demeanor of pretending to be relaxed too clumsy and exaggerated?He can make up stories to deceive his women, but he can't convince careful women.

In fact, when a person loves each other deeply, what can be concealed?
The man recalled that for more than 20 days, every day, there was a plate of scrambled eggs with fungus on the dinner table.Men know that fungus can clear the lungs.Dusty man needs a plate of scrambled eggs with fungus.Sometimes women force him to eat two spoonfuls of pear paste.The man thought, it was also carefully planned by the woman.Also, women don't pester him to watch TV series with her these days because he's so tired.Now a man is completely convinced that a woman already knows his secret, that she is doing things for him silently, but never revealing it.A man whose career is in full swing suddenly loses his job and becomes penniless. This is a secret that belongs to both the man and hers.She had to bite the pain and keep her mouth shut.She can't let anyone know, including the man who made the secret.

The man stood on the balcony watching the night view of the city, and finally a tear fell.

In married life, there is a kind of emotion called being in love with each other, and another kind of emotion called being in love with each other. In fact, there is another kind of emotion called being tight-lipped.How much support and trust is contained in this tight-lipped love?She knew that the man was in a predicament at this time, and the woman also knew that it would be a pain for the man to expose it. If the husband does not say anything, there is a reason for the husband, so she chose to remain silent and help him in the predicament.This kind of love can't help us feel the tacit understanding and firmness of their marriage.

support each other in trouble

We all know that the journey of marriage cannot be smooth sailing, so couples in trouble should love each other and tide over difficulties together.

1. When facing difficulties, learn to reduce stress, that is to face life optimistically.For one party's unexpected setbacks, the other party must not complain.At this time, encouragement and understanding are the most important communication.For example, when the husband encounters difficulties, it is best for the wife not to express her worries about her husband, so as not to strengthen his inappropriate emotions.

Hawthorne, the great American writer, might not be able to occupy a place in the literary world if his wife Sophia did not fully support him.

Before Hawthorne became famous, he was a clerk in customs. One day he went home dejectedly and told his wife that he had been fired.Not only did his wife not express any dissatisfaction, but she exclaimed excitedly: "This way you can concentrate on writing books." "Yes," Hawthorne replied with a wry smile, "I just write books and quit Job, what do we live on?"

At this time Sophia opened the drawer and took out a wad of banknotes.

"Where did this money come from?" Hawthorne asked in surprise with his mouth wide open.

"I have always believed that you have a talent for writing," Sophia explained, "I believe that one day you will write a famous book, so every week I save a little for family expenses, and now the money is enough for us Lived for a year."

With his wife's spiritual and financial support, Hawthorne devoted himself to writing, and finally completed the masterpiece in the history of American literature - "The Scarlet Letter".

If Hawthorne was fired and disappointed, his wife would make a big noise, maybe Hawthorne would not have achieved what he is today; if Sophia hadn't supported Hawthorne, maybe we wouldn't see "The Scarlet Letter" today. This is a masterpiece.In difficult times, people need more understanding and support, especially the understanding and support of those closest to them.

2. If one of the two persons is primarily responsible for the problem, the other should also see the mental stress that this responsibility brings to the other, and should be able to care for the other at all times.

3. When unexpected situations arise in life, in the face of new problems and responsibilities, be brave to challenge difficulties and take responsibility instead of seeing it as a burden. Maybe this will make you re-recognize the other party's contribution to the family.

4. Be kind to each other. The more difficult and difficult we are, the more we need emotional comfort.Don't regard the problem as caused by "us", but as the external situation. Instead of blaming each other or quarreling, calm down to analyze the problem objectively, and consider the problem from the perspective of the other party. The possibility of adversity will be greater.

To see whether your marriage is firmly rooted, it depends on how you go through adversity, because adversity is a good test of marriage.

Difficulties are not absolute, but relative. No matter how small the difficulty is, if the two people do not work together, it will become a big difficulty; Can't pass the Kaner.

2. We need each other to encourage each other even more in difficult times

Encourage to make difficulties not difficult
As the saying goes: "One good word warms three winters." A short sentence and a warm look are enough to melt the glacier in the other person's heart.Anyone who falls down hopes to hear strong words around him: "Get up, I support you!" When failing, everyone hopes to have a warm hand to give a little strength.

From a shoe shiner to a small clothing store owner to the only agent of an international brand in Chongqing, Xiao Shen is very grateful to his gentle and kind wife.If he hadn't met the kind and beautiful Chongqing wife Xiao Liao, maybe he still has nothing now.

Xiao Shen was born in an ordinary peasant family in Zhejiang.When he was young, he suffered from polio due to high fever, and his right leg was disabled.Because of difficulty in walking, his mother had to carry him to school for 5 years.On a snowy day, his mother fell and broke a bone, and could no longer carry him to school, so he reluctantly bid farewell to school.

When his peers were in high school, Xiao Shen was already making a living locally mending leather shoes.In his heart, he felt that his family had paid too much for him, and he must repay his family in the future.

Then there was a chance, he said goodbye to his family with the savings of more than 3 yuan he earned from mending shoes, and came to Chongqing alone to venture into the world.He sub-rented half a storefront in Yudong, Banan District, at a monthly rent of 1000 yuan, and sold woolen sweaters from Zhejiang.In order to save money, he spent 25 yuan a month to rent a shed in the countryside near Yudong.Every morning before dawn, he lifts off the straw mat on his body and goes out.

Every day he spends in hardship.One day, a beautiful girl walked into his shop.This girl surnamed Liao once had an acquaintance with him in his hometown.She just took a fancy to his spirit of self-improvement and perseverance, and soon they became good friends.

When Xiao Shen moved the store to a lively place, he was robbed right after opening, and he lost everything overnight.Thinking of the store he worked so hard to manage, and the filial parents waiting for him at home, all the grievances and helplessness made him cry a lot.

The helplessness of life made him plan to return to Zhejiang.At this time, Miss Xiao Liao came to him, enlightened him, encouraged him, and helped him. "You can do it, don't give up." Because of her support, Xiao Shen regrouped and started the tie business.Xiao Liao began to help Xiao Shen manage the tie shop and became his free salesperson.With Xiao Liao's help, Xiao Shen's store is running in full swing.After experiencing twists and turns, Xiao Shen boldly confessed his love to Miss Xiao Liao.

Two struggling young people got married.After several years of hard work, Xiao Shen is now the only agent of an international brand in Chongqing, and has become a member of the CPPCC Banan District and the vice chairman of the Banan District Association for the Handicapped.

In Xiao Shen's heart, all his success comes from his wife's encouragement and help.His wife is someone he will be grateful for all his life, and he vows to treat her well and repay her for the rest of his life. "If it weren't for my wife, I wouldn't be where I am today." These words reminded him all the time in his heart.

A smart woman will definitely give her husband gentle affirmation.Give a man comfort when he is down, because a word of comfort can make a man stand up again; give him encouragement when a man fails, because a word of encouragement can make a man find himself and work hard again; give him confidence when a man has ideals , because a little self-confidence can make a man work extra hard.

Life is an uneven road; life is a river that is not easy to cross.In life, we need to replace indifference with encouragement and encourage people to forge ahead.In married life, only the husband and wife are the closest people. Therefore, in difficult times, husband and wife need to encourage and cheer each other up.

Encourage each other and see hope

When people are most difficult and almost desperate, if there are no people who love each other to encourage each other, then the whole sky seems to be falling down, not to mention the hope for life.However, no matter how difficult it is, with the support, the encouragement of the closest relatives, the warm words of the closest relatives, the cold and hopeless heart can once again ignite hope.

In just 39 days, it was unfortunate for Zhang Guilin, a villager who lives in Xiaoqing Township, Xiuwen County: his 5-year-old son left them due to illness, and then his wife and two daughters were involved in a car accident while driving. His daughter passed away in a car accident, and his wife and youngest daughter have not recovered yet.In the ward, the reporter saw such a touching scene. Although the family suffered such a big change, Zhang Guilin and his wife did not lose confidence in life and encouraged each other to "be strong, we can't get down".

At around 9:17 p.m. on September 7, when the lights were on and families were reunited, 38-year-old Zhang Guilin was in a ward turning his moaning wife on the hospital bed, rubbing the back of his hands, and comforting his wife from time to time. "My youngest daughter should also be treated in the hospital, because there is no money, so I have to save the seriously injured wife first." Zhang Guilin told the reporter in a very peaceful tone, while his wife had tears in her eyes, trying to avoid her husband. Concerned gaze.

Zhang Guilin told reporters that on May 5 this year, his 27-year-old son developed symptoms such as sore throat and headache. He first sent his son to a nearby clinic for treatment. The doctor injected penicillin into the throat and pricked silver needles in the abdomen. Afterwards, the child convulsed and died when he was transferred to the hospital for rescue.According to the forensic examination, the child's death was caused by a respiratory infection. He died after the doctor injected penicillin into the throat and pricked silver needles in the abdomen. not processed.Just as Zhang Guilin was about to apply for a medical malpractice appraisal on his son's death, unfortunate disasters struck him again. On July 5, the wife took her 7-year-old eldest daughter and 6-year-old daughter to visit her parents. The car fell into a valley tens of meters deep within 12 minutes of driving.After the local hospital tried its best to rescue her, the eldest daughter passed away the next day.The youngest daughter was not seriously injured, but because she had no money, she stayed in the hospital for a few days and returned home before recovering.

The reporter learned from the hospital that Zhang Guilin's wife suffered multiple fractures in the cervical spine, thoracic spine, head and other parts. Although her life was out of danger, once she relaxed for treatment, his wife might be paralyzed.Zhang Guilin said that he has a pair of elderly parents himself. The two old people were in tears all day long. His father also fell ill and was admitted to another hospital. His mother and young daughter had to be entrusted to relatives to take care of them.

"No matter what kind of troubles I encounter in the future, I will never give up treating my wife." Zhang Guilin said that his wife was also afraid that Zhang Guilin would not be able to withstand the blow, so she often cheered him up: "You are the pillar of the family, and your spirit is so strong." Don’t collapse, if you also collapse, this family will have no hope.” Zhang Guilin and his wife encouraged each other in this way, and they have been supporting each other until now.When the reporter was leaving, the reporter saw Zhang Guilin's wife slowly falling asleep, but Zhang Guilin was not idle, and was still giving his wife a hand massage.

The situation of Zhang Guilin and his wife moved each of us, but at the same time we were also shocked. Under such great pressure, they were not crushed by difficulties, because they all had the same spiritual support!At the same time, they also let us see that the difficulties are only temporary, and they will always walk over with a smile.

But there are also such people in life who use indifference instead of encouragement, and even scolding instead of encouragement.We must know that the human heart is fragile, like the yellow leaves in autumn, any slight autumn wind will cause the yellow leaves to bleak and wither.Please let us replace indifference and scolding with encouragement, and care for people's hearts like crystals!

Of course, the world is a good place.There are many people who fall and then get up; there are many people who have lost and then rise again.But how many people behind them have given them sonorous and powerful words, and how many people have given them warm eyes!

Life is beautiful, but at the same time it is rough. When we move forward, if we can encourage more and less indifference, this road of life will be better.So, please don't begrudge your sonorous words and warm eyes.

3. Experience true love in suffering
Today's TV, movies, novels, and magazines are everywhere interpreting the "love of lovers" that is not the relationship between husband and wife. They are all mellow and unforgettable stories. There is no truth to speak of.In fact, there is more true love between husband and wife, especially when husband and wife are in suffering together, it is just hidden in the trivial life and overlapping days and has not been taken seriously. As long as you savor it carefully, you will feel that only this Love is truly invaluable.It is like a trickle of water, continuously watering the garden of the couple's life, making that garden lush and green forever.

Only the true love between husband and wife is the most real, and when the husband and wife go through hardships together, this love is even more precious.There are countless such stories.

One day in summer, Robert and his wife Mary went out for a trip. When they climbed up a steep cliff, Robert was enjoying the scenery of nature to the fullest, while his wife Mary was taking pictures as souvenirs.Suddenly, Robert stumbled on the cliff. Seeing that Robert was about to slide down the cliff, his wife Mary bit her husband's coat skirt in desperation. Fortunately, she hugged a tree beside her.Mary knew she couldn't let up, or her husband would die.In this way, Mary gritted her teeth, and the two rows of white teeth bore the full weight of a tall and burly body. They were not rescued until they were discovered by tourists an hour later.

According to research, it is impossible for human teeth to bear such a heavy weight, and it lasts for such a long time, which is really a miracle.

When Robert and Mary were in trouble, Mary created a miracle that ordinary people could not do. I think this is the power of true love.

(End of this chapter)