no-complaint marriage

Chapter 4 Be a Virtuous Wife (3)
Behind her husband's back, she sent an expensive gift to the leader's wife, hoping that the leader's wife could blow the leader's pillow, saying that her husband had changed his mind and was willing to do administrative work.It worked.A few days later, the leader talked to her husband again, saying that the organization accepted his reconsideration, and told him tactfully that if you have any ideas in the future, you can directly talk to him, and you don't need to be so polite.He, the second monk, was puzzled and still insisted on his own ideas. He rejected this post that many people missed, and the leader couldn't step down as a result.

When Li Mei knew the result, she had a big fight with him.Isn't it for him and for this family that I put all my effort into it? He actually refused so easily.When the husband learned that all this was "helped" by Li Mei, he was even more annoyed.He said that he can solve his own affairs without her help, not to mention that he has his own principles and ideals.But now the leader thinks that what he said was insincere and duplicity, making him not a human being inside and out.

All this was caused by Li Mei not respecting her husband's principles and choices, and arranging everything for her husband on her own initiative.

When you are dissatisfied with your lover, you should communicate with him, communicate and negotiate, and respect his own opinions.Instead of arbitrariness, call the shots for him.In this way, you will be thankless, and it will also affect the relationship between husband and wife, turning what could have been resolved peacefully into a war.Although sometimes you do do it for his own good, but he may not accept your favor.Because everyone has their own way of dealing with the world, and they all hope that their master is themselves, not others.

So, wise woman, if you love your husband, please respect him, because he also has self-esteem, and respect is a deeper love.

5. Recall the husband's dysfunctional "sense of smell" with tenderness

In this era of more and more temptations, under the background of strong impact on traditional moral concepts, "affairs" has almost become something that many women have to face and guard against.

Tenderness is the magic weapon for a woman to win
Why do men cheat?Diane Baroni and Betty Kelly, two senior copy editors of the well-known American magazine "Cosmopolitan", believe that men are not inherently unfaithful animals, and there are "too many unspeakable secrets" about men's infidelity.They co-authored a book called "Get the Man You Love Back", which analyzed in detail the reasons why men cheat emotionally: some women lack passion in sex because of women's numbness; some men want to get rid of boring married life; there are also reasons for avoiding pressure, women not caring enough about men; and so on.Because of these reasons, the husband's insensitive "smell" is more likely to fail, so what can the wife do to bring back the husband's failed sense of smell?
A man has a man's rigidity, a woman might as well use a woman's softness to overcome rigidity with softness, and use tenderness to recall her husband's dysfunctional sense of smell!It's the best way to use tenderness instead of head-on.

I once heard such a story:
There is a loving couple who have been married for many years. Both husband and wife are excellent. The husband is a lecturer in the Chinese Department of the university, and the wife is a middle school teacher. They are both talented and beautiful.Although her husband is in his late [-]s, he is still personable, especially the girls in the campus are envious of his full of talent.Finally one day, a girl with outstanding talent broke their peaceful life.The husband's eyes were no longer clear, his sighs became heavy, and his heart gradually drifted away.

The wife seemed to have noticed the change in her husband. She didn't cry or make trouble, and she still performed her duties as a wife as always.One weekend, when the husband was not at home, the wife sent a text message to the girl in the name of her husband, asking her to come and visit her.The girl arrived as promised, but she didn't expect that it was the hostess who greeted her.The girl was still domineering and did not show any weakness. She said that she admired his talent and that she really loved him. She didn't separate them on purpose, she just wanted to pursue true love, and she let her fulfill them.

The wife said that they can be fulfilled, but some things must be explained clearly. She said: "He is a smoker, he smokes one by one when he writes, and he smokes two or three packs a day; he is a slacker, and he never does housework. The house is full of stinky socks he throws away, you have to clean up after him; he is a drunkard, those so-called poems are all masterpieces after being drunk; He is a scholar; he has no economic acumen, does not know how to manage accounts, and the money disappears as soon as it is in his hands. If you can accept his shortcomings, then I can help you."

The girl said nothing, got up and left in a hurry.There has been no news since.

Life has returned to the original track, and the husband and wife are still as loving as ever.

It is very gratifying to see such an ending, and it makes us admire the wisdom and wit of this wife.But at the end of the day, this result was achieved because the wife didn't take a tough stance and lash out at the girl, but communicated with the girl and forgave her husband.She finally used her tenderness to awaken her husband's sense of failure, making him realize that his wife is the one worthy of love in his life, and bringing a marriage that was about to collapse back on the right track.

A woman is more beautiful when she is as tender as water

Most people describe women's tenderness as tenderness like water. The characteristics of water are soft, refreshing and simple, gentle and supple, lingering and flexible, and its shape is indefinite, which can show the beauty of women at will.The ancient Greek philosopher Plato said: "Beauty is proper." French writer Balzac said: "Beauty is a kind of proper coordination and moderation." , beautiful manners, beautiful figure, etc., but the tenderness like water has a unique charm.

A woman's tenderness is like water.Women are more tender, and tenderness is the beauty.Tenderness can blow away the worries and troubles in people's hearts like a spring breeze, and bring people happiness and joy; it is also like a clear stream, watering the tree of friendship and the flower of love, making everything beautiful and harmonious.In the era of reform and opening up where the strong are like a forest, people seem to have a kind of admiration for the "strong man" and "iron fist", and disdain to talk about the tenderness of women. ", and "iron fist" and "strongman" would have no tenderness.actually not.The beloved revolutionary Deng Yingchao was busy with official duties during his lifetime, and often used needles to mend clothes for Premier Zhou.Margaret Thatcher, the former British Prime Minister, was known as the "Iron Woman". Although she had a lot of work to do, she still found time to buy sausages for her husband and cook in the kitchen herself.

A woman's tenderness mostly comes from nature.When a young girl faces the lover she loves, her heart can't help but be full of tenderness.This tenderness can turn into soft touches and sweet kisses.She will give her all for love, even make sacrifices.When a young wife faces her husband, she will be considerate, caring, tender and tolerant.As a wife, she will decorate the room freshly and elegantly, making the home full of warmth; she will dress up youthfully and beautifully to win the favor of her husband; she will carefully cook delicious meals to strengthen the nutrition for her busy husband; , she sat side by side with her husband and chatted, told each other about her feelings, and comforted her husband's sad heart.

A woman's tenderness also includes a woman's motherhood, one of which is derived from the primogeniture of a woman's life-egg.The mature egg stays in the mother's body for nearly 10 months after fertilization, and the woman treats it with tenderness and love all the time, which makes the woman's temperament gentle because of the mother's sense of responsibility and the relationship of blood.Even a woman with a rough disposition softens when she is about to become a mother.From childbirth to raising a child to adulthood, this motherhood always manifests itself in a woman.Because this kind of tenderness is a kind of consideration and comfort to men, and a kind of protection and care to children, it is highly praised by the society and regarded as a female virtue.

A man can resist many things, but he cannot resist a woman's tenderness.Therefore, women should cherish their own tenderness like water and spread tenderness to every corner of marriage. On the one hand, it can prevent the husband's "smell" from malfunctioning; on the other hand, it can be repaired in time when the husband's "smell" fails.

6. Be a weakling in front of your husband

In today's society, more and more women leave the family and devote themselves to work.In this ever-changing era, the workplace is no longer just a man's world, and women and men have the same opportunities for success.Therefore, in order to be more competitive in society and defeat men, women must constantly enrich themselves and make themselves stronger.In this way, there are gains in the workplace, but there are bound to be losses in the family and marriage. Many women's careers bloom, and their families and marriages "wither".

The Distress of a Strong Woman
Those women who are independent at work, equal to men, and have been fighting in the workplace for a long time are all surrounded by beauty, fashion, nobility, trend and glamor.There are too many auras shrouded in them, making women envious and men envious.Because they have independent financial ability, they are rich and free in basic necessities of life, their work is excellent and challenging, and they are full of endless charm in every gesture.

Mrs. Thatcher, the Iron Lady, once said: "The biggest mistake a woman can make in her life is to forget that she is a woman." Don't let your dreams fall behind others.But why do many men "turn pale when they talk about strong women"?Is such an ambitious woman "daunting" after being given the title of "strong woman"?

In fact, if it is just because women are successful in their careers and lead a group of men, there will be an imbalance in the hearts of men, and that’s all. The terrible thing is that many strong women have even given up most of the characteristics of women.From hair style to clothing, from conversation style to decision-making, they show a kind of "female man" demeanor everywhere.In fact, because they neglect to maintain the soft and gentle side of women's nature, when they behave in a masculine way, men will obviously feel threatened and challenged.If things go on like this, strong women will fall into crisis instead.

There was a couple of workers whose income was not high, but they were very loving and lived a happy life.After the reform and opening up, the wife stayed without pay and opened a restaurant.Later, the business gradually expanded, and the wife became more and more busy. From morning to night, she only devoted herself to the restaurant, no longer caring about the family, husband, and children. She didn't care about these things, and she seemed to have forgotten the concept of marriage.Occasionally when she came home, she either complained to her husband or got angry with her children, making the family no longer like a family, and the love between husband and wife was gone.

When someone asked about her child, her answer was: "Don't mention it, I don't know, I hired a tutor for him (the child), and hired a nanny to take care of his life. I am too busy to take care of him." Unexpectedly, this child is not up to date, either skipping classes or not at ease, anyway, he does not study well. I changed schools for him again, and the tuition fee is several thousand yuan a year, but he still does not study well. His father doesn’t know what to do, I won’t let him I did that crappy job, but he just doesn’t listen to me, the little money he earns is not even enough to buy soy sauce! I don’t count on him anymore.”

This long-term lack of communication with her husband made her ignorant of the outside world and her husband's thinking.Finally, the husband got a new woman and proposed to divorce her. As a result, the property was divided into two, and her restaurant could no longer be opened. In the end, he ended up with no success in family, marriage, or career.

For such a wife, the husband has already developed a sense of fear and boredom towards her.Who would endure such a wife?She no longer had the gentleness and submission of the past. Instead, she thought that her husband was inferior to her. She thought that she was the master of the family, and her husband was just a vassal of hers.There is no more love in such a marriage, so naturally there will be no good results, and the marriage can only be ruined in the end.

Be a weakling in front of your husband

Women should maintain their unique nature, be a weak person in front of their husbands, and let him protect you instead of overwhelming him with your morale, then you will have more than a strong woman.Because, in terms of image, feminine women are very easy to be accepted and loved by the public; in terms of personality traits, although everyone is different, gentleness, consideration, and understanding are probably the qualities that can win the respect and love of others.

Of course, for a wife to be the weakling in front of her husband, it does not mean that she should bow her knees, submissive in front of her husband, and obey like a slave.It means that a wife should have more delicate feelings, considerate and careful, quiet and charming, rather than weak and attached to others.

A smart woman knows how to be strong in front of others and weak in front of her husband.They never forget their identities: women + wives!In this way, she is not only a leader in her career and a strong woman, but also a good wife in front of her husband.

Heard this story:
Queen Victoria of England once had a quarrel with her husband, and the husband went back to the bedroom alone, shutting the door.When the Queen returned to her bedroom, she had to knock on the door.

The husband asked inside, "Who?"

Victoria proudly replied: "Queen."

Unexpectedly, the door was neither opened nor heard.

She had to knock on the door again.

Inside asked again: "Who?"

"Victoria," the Queen replied.

There was still no movement inside, so the queen had to knock on the door again.

Inside asked again: "Who?"

The queen learned to behave, and replied softly: "It's your wife."

This time the door opened.

The queen has supreme power and honor, but also has a cultivation beyond ordinary people.She knows how to maintain her husband's dignity and win over men's hearts. Although she is above ten thousand people, she is willing to be weak in front of her husband because she is clear about her role in marriage and family.

It is actually not difficult to become a strong woman and a good wife like Queen Victoria, as long as you make your husband feel how important and indispensable he is in the family and in your heart, then your "weakness" is outstanding!

There is a couple, the wife is the chairman of the company, and the husband is just an ordinary employee of the company.But this wife always looks for her "old man" whenever she encounters a problem.

"Old man, why is the machine doing this?"

"Old man, what do you think is wrong?"

"Old man, do you think it's okay to make a decision like this?"

……

Even the speech written by the secretary for her, she has to show her "old man" to see if it works.

She often praises her husband when he solves the problem.Sometimes when they encountered problems that their husbands could not solve, they would study together and then ask others for help.

People who don't know the truth will doubt her ability and how she became the chairman behind her back.Most people would think she didn't understand anything.

But one day, when her husband was away, she began to show her talents.It seems that there is nothing she can't do. She directs the work of thousands of employees, she is so capable and decisive, and she is completely different from her before.

Only then did people understand that she actually knew everything, but she appeared weak in front of her husband, not really weak.

The wife's weakness is shown in front of her husband. She is successful, but she is weak in front of her husband. This not only satisfies the husband's desire for protection and makes him feel more pity for her, but also makes her show off.In this way, the status of the two people in the marriage will be harmonious and stable.

Perfect transition between strong woman and weak woman

As a professional woman who wants to make a difference, she wants to be a strong woman in the workplace, but also a weak person in front of her husband. How can she achieve a perfect transition between the two?The following aspects need attention:
1. From the design of the appearance image, it is the best policy to adopt a principle of being neither humble nor overbearing.It is necessary to show one's shrewd and capable qualities and abilities outside, and to be very reasonable, dignified and graceful in front of her husband.Therefore, the clothes should not imitate the roughness and boldness of men. A little chic is enough, but not too much.

2. In terms of dealing with others, you must not follow the example of men who are too refined and decisive, and do things regardless of the consequences.Especially in front of the husband and when dealing with family affairs, give the husband some opportunities not to lose his wife's true colors.If you lose your nature as a woman, you lose most of you, and it will be difficult for you to be recognized by others.

3. Know how to change your identity in time.Be a "strong woman" at work, and work as vigorously and vigorously as a man; after get off work, she becomes a little bird, and is willing to be at a disadvantage at home.

4. Show your weakness at the right time.If you are as strong as you are on the outside, like a hag, your husband will definitely be afraid of you, and whoever wants to get along with a hag will slip away whenever he has the chance.

5. Don't always focus on yourself.In a family, two members are indispensable.Since marriage is a dance of two people, no matter how busy you are, you must insist on dancing for a while every day.

Being weak in front of your husband is a potential language to make your husband love you. If you are so strong that no one needs you, you can only ask for trouble.The husband also likes his wife's weakness, because he knows that only his wife's weakness can bring out his stalwart and strength.In many cases, the husband will help the wife to make him realize his own value more clearly. In addition, the wife is a weak person in front of the husband, which also provides a platform for the husband to improve his self-confidence.After the husband realizes his own value, his latent enthusiasm will be aroused even more.Conversely, if the wife is stronger than the husband, and the husband is worthless, then what face does the husband have?
7. Acting like a baby depends on the timing

Some people say that a good woman is the best among women, and a woman who can act like a baby is the best among women.For thousands of years, acting like a baby has always been a woman's nature. Women don't have to be beautiful, but they must be able to act like a baby, because acting like a baby is a weapon and a powerful trump card against men.

The woman who can act like a baby is the most favored
If life is coffee, then being coquettish is like sugar, too little sugar will be bitter, too much sugar will be nauseating.Women with high EQ and wisdom in the world know how to act like a baby, and they also know that their own destiny is actually controlled by their own heads and mouths.

(End of this chapter)