Calm: Be a calm woman

Chapter 30 A Stormy Face—A Calm and Calm Woman Facing the World with a Calm and Unfazed Attitude (3)
Sleep can completely relax us.When we sleep, we should forget about all our problems, stop hating those who have made things difficult for us, and accept all our own shortcomings.Sleep is supposed to bring us relief, it should allow us to rest and recharge our batteries so that we can cope with the complexities of life.

Dear you, please remember: Although there are certain things in life that you must do, you are also free to choose what you don't have to do.

Don't cling to the 10% of your life
"Time Magazine" once published such a report, a soldier was wounded, he was hit in the throat by shrapnel, and he had already received seven blood transfusions.He wrote a little note to the doctor, asking, "Can I still live?" The doctor said, "Yes." He wrote another little note, "Can I still talk?" The doctor said, " Yes." After listening to the doctor's answer, he wrote on a small note: "Then why should I worry about it!"

Yes, why don't you stop right away and ask yourself, "What else do I have to worry about?" You'll find that all the things you're worrying about are nothing compared to other people's.

About 90% of the things in life are right, only 10% may be wrong.If we want to be happy, we should focus our energy on the 90% of the right things and ignore the 10% of the mistakes.If you want to worry, be sad, or get a stomach ulcer, focus on the 10% that is wrong and ignore the 90% that is good.

Swift, the author of "Gulliver's Travels", can be said to be the most pessimistic writer in the history of English literature.Saddened by his bad background, he wears black clothes and goes on a hunger strike every year on his birthday.Although pessimistic and desperate, he also believes that happiness and happiness can bring people positive and healthy."The best doctors in the world are three of them: Diet, Quiet and Happy," he said.

We enjoy the free service of "Happy Doctor" all the time.As long as we focus on the wealth we have, which exceeds the treasures of Alibaba-would you be willing to exchange a pair of eyes for [-] million dollars?How much do you think your legs should sell for?And your hands, your hearing, your family... Add all these properties together, you will find how rich you are, even if all the gold of the Rockefeller, Ford and Morgan families were given to you, you would not exchange it .

How many people can really understand these?rare.As Schopenhauer said: "We seldom think about what we have, but always think about what we don't have." This is the greatest tragedy in life, and the pain it brings may be greater than all wars and diseases in history. more pain.

It was this that nearly ruined John Bermer's family and nearly turned him "from a normal man into a grumpy old fellow".Here's what he told his own story.He said: "After I retired, I started a business. I worked hard day and night to finally make everything go smoothly. But soon I found the problem. I didn't have access to the parts and materials I needed, which made me probably give up on myself. so my heart was full of worries and I went from a normal person to a grumpy old guy with an increasingly weird temper. Things got worse and worse and almost destroyed my happy family. Until one day, I was One of the young soldiers under his command said, "John, you should feel as if you're the only one who's bothered in the whole world. So what if you quit your career? You can start over when everything's back to normal. You've got more to lose." What a thing to be thankful for, and yet you keep complaining. God! I wish I were you. Look at me, I have only one arm left, and half my face is burned, but I never complain. If you If you continue like this, you will not only lose your career, but you may also lose your family, health, and friends."

"A few words awakened the person in the dream, and I found that I was going nowhere. So I decided to change myself and get back to the original me. Fortunately, I have done it now."

Another friend of mine, Lucille Blake, was on the verge of breaking down before she understood this.We've been friends for years and took short-story writing together at Columbia University's School of Journalism.When she lived in Duson City, Arizona nine years ago, her life changed a lot. Let's hear her story:
"I'm so busy all day, going to the University of Arizona to learn the organ, running a language school in the city, teaching music appreciation classes at Desert Willow Ranch, attending parties, Proms, horseback riding under the stars. One morning I had a heart attack and I was totally broken. The doctor didn't say anything to encourage me other than 'you'll have to stay in bed for a year' and I didn't know myself Can fully recover.

"To be in bed for a year, like a cripple, and possibly die - the sight terrifies me. I keep asking myself, why me? Why am I doing this? What have I done? Suffering such retribution? I cried and complained that fate was unfair to me, and my heart was full of resentment. But no matter what, I could only listen to the doctor's words and lie in bed to accept the sentence of fate. I have an artist neighbor named Rudolph. He said to me: "Maybe you think it's too painful to lie in bed like this for a year, but it's not completely true. You can use this time to get to know yourself well. I believe your thoughts will improve a lot, maybe more than You can learn more in the previous half of your life.' After listening to him, my heart was much quieter, and I let myself try to learn new values ​​and read some useful books. One day, I heard a news on a radio station The commentator said: 'You should talk about what you know.' I've heard it a lot before, and I don't really understand what it means now. I'm determined to only pay attention to things that have a positive meaning in my life. Every morning, I just let myself think of some positive things, I am not in pain, my daughter is very cute, my eyes and ears are good, the radio is playing beautiful music, I have enough time to read and study, I have an appetite Great, not bad sleep, I have a lot of good friends, so my doctor had to put up a 'only one guest at a time' sign, and limited hours... I should be happy about all of this .

"Nine years have passed, and my life is rich and vivid now. I am grateful for this experience. It was the most rewarding and happiest year I have spent in Arizona. I still maintain the The habit of thinking about how many proud things I have every morning is the most precious wealth in my life. Sometimes I am really ashamed because I am afraid that I will not understand the true meaning of life until I die.”

Dear Lucille Blake, in case you don't know it, what you do understand is exactly what Dr. Samuel Johnson discovered more than 200 years ago: "Get into the habit of looking at the positive side of things, and make more money than you make a year." A thousand pounds is more important." Those who cling to the 10% of negative things often live in a mess and cannot find the meaning of life.

I would like to remind ladies that this statement is not coming from an optimist.The person who said this has experienced 20 years of pain, lack of food and clothing, and finally became a famous writer of a generation and one of the most famous speakers in history.

Learn to relax in a busy life

Whether you are a physical worker or a mental worker, you all need to relax without exception.In life, many people are reluctant to take time to rest after busy work, because they think that rest is rest.

In fact, rest is not only a rest, but also a repair.If you are a physical worker, resting can make you have more physical strength; if you are a mental worker, resting before you feel tired can keep you awake longer.

(End of this chapter)