Calm women are the most elegant

Chapter 31 In social situations, maintain a calm and elegant image (2)
If you want to be a popular and elegant woman, you must control your mouth and speak beautiful words whenever and wherever.

Here's a secret about talking that you probably don't know: swearing can really make a woman ugly.

Your brain responds differently when you utter nice words than when you utter vulgar language.The energy generated by swearing is the strongest.Most areas of our brains are active during swearing, which triggers strong mood swings and stress responses.Originally, language has the function of controlling emotions, but foul language makes it difficult for this inhibition function to work.In the long run, the impact on women will be greater.

Connecting the left brain (rational thinking) and the right brain (perceptual thinking) is the brain beam line (transmission belt of information). Women's wires are thicker than men's, so the ability to process information is stronger, so they are more vulnerable to verbal interference. influences.Precisely because women are more sensitive to words, they are more affected.That is to say, the swear words uttered are actually reflected back on themselves.

Beautiful words can relax and calm the brain, and the resulting beautiful pictures will also make the mood peaceful and stable.Polite words are great for relieving stress, and onomatopoeia can also conjure up beautiful images and calm the mind... yes, words are so powerful.So, how should you say it?

[-]. Put an end to foul language

For elegant women, foul language in public is always taboo.When a man hears a woman swearing, he will only be "shocked" and stay away, because it will remind them that people who often use swearing have accumulated anger and dissatisfaction in their hearts for a long time, or they don't know how to control their emotions at all. No regard for other people's feelings.

[-]. Put the volume down, and add points for elegance
As long as you are in a public place, please be sure to pay attention to the volume. Excessive sound is an infringement and "violence" to other people's ears, especially in those crowded closed spaces, such as subways and restaurants. I know my quality is low.Instead of yelling, it is better to find a quiet place to answer, so that you can take care of others.

This also applies in normal conversations. The best volume for speaking is to allow the other party to hear clearly without disturbing others. Having someone else in your eyes will add points to your elegance.

[-]. Slowness is a gentle force
An increasingly anxious life brings faster and faster speech.Talking too fast will lead to often blurting out without thinking. That kind of words are just a reflexive response to life, and they often lack inner feelings and strength.Talking too fast not only shows your anxiety, it can also tax someone else's brain.A person who speaks at a gentle speed can often soothe other people's emotions, just like a mother's pat and whisper, and this trick is more effective when getting along with irritable people.

Pay attention to the speed of your usual speaking. This may be the easiest way to make your words full of emotional penetration. An image metaphor is to let your words sink from your brain to your heart and then say them out of your mouth. will be truly touching.

[-]. Wait until others have finished speaking before speaking

Don't let your speech overlap with other people's reverberation. This is the most basic courtesy and the most basic respect.Remember, no matter what the other person's attitude is, respect for others is never just because the other person deserves respect, but because you are a tolerant and graceful person.

People who are too eager to interrupt others are not liked even if they look like gods. This habit is to tell others clearly: "Shut up! I'm not interested in listening to your nonsense!"

[-]. Choose positive words

People who like to use negative words undoubtedly have more pickiness and complaints about life. Who likes to be with people who are full of negative energy all day long?Using more positive words is not just to make others like you, but more importantly, to adjust your outlook on life.

Instead of constantly cursing: "Why is it so bad?", it is better to say: "I think the part that can be improved is..."; What else can we do?" Everyone prefers a problem solver.

[-]. Don't begrudge your praise
People who can see the beauty of others must have a beautiful heart. What you see in others is not only because of their appearance, but also depends on what kind of glasses you wear.Praise is the best gift we can give to others, and it has infinite power.

A person who is good at praising others will also become beautiful in the eyes of others.We naturally like those who like us, and liking is the best beauty technique in the human mind.If you want yourself to be beautiful in the eyes of others, you must first make others feel good.

[-]. Use more honorifics
The most basic honorifics such as "your surname" and "longevity" have become rare these days, and even those who hear them may feel novelty.Of course, this does not mean that we don’t need it. On the contrary, if we come up and ask: "How old is your grandma this year?"

Learning some useful honorifics will make you stand out in those solemn social occasions, appearing both cultured and cultivated.

Eight, the speech should also be graded

How would you feel if you were on the subway and heard a woman rant about how her "big aunt" was not on time?When she went on to complain loudly about how her boyfriend didn't take pity on her, I believe most men would be thankful—fortunately, she wasn't his girlfriend.

Movie classification is to respect the needs of different people. Conversation classification is not only to protect your privacy but also to respect the ears of others. People who talk about private matters loudly are either too narcissistic or have no brains at all.

[-]. Add soft prefixes and suffixes
The beauty of women lies not in their hardness but in their softness, and their strength in tenacity rather than strength.Some auxiliary words that can soften the speech can be appropriately injected into the conversation to increase the charm of women.

There are two easiest ways, one is to use some prefixes and suffixes, such as "um", "good", "well, so that's how it is", Shanghai people like to say "um, yes" is also very good .

The second is to turn imperative or declarative sentences into questions: "Will you buy me a cup of coffee?" "You're so sad, aren't you?" "You're angry, aren't you?" Being imposed upon with orders or judgments, while being curious is also a sign of caring.

[-]. Be cautious about sex to avoid being misunderstood

The progress and openness of society allow women to talk about sex openly, but unscrupulously adding those sex-related words to your speech does not mean that you are a pioneer of feminism, but will cause unnecessary trouble.

Women with the word "reliance" everywhere will make men think that their sexual concepts are open or their sexual desires are too strong, and they will even seduce some men to make disrespectful words and verbally harass them with pornographic jokes.So please leave them to those who won't misunderstand you.

[-]. Decline to gossip, don’t be a gossip
Women are born to gossip, but too much participation or even initiating gossip will give people the impression of a gossip. Who have you ever seen gossip calmly and gracefully?That's because talking about people's rights and wrongs behind their backs is often consciously wrong, so everything from expressions to gestures is tricky.

Besides, spreading these gossips to other people's ears is definitely not good for you. Think about it in another way, you certainly don't like others talking about you behind your back, don't you?When you hear false rumors about your friends, you should stand up and refute them, which will also make others afraid to chew your tongue casually.

5.Contrived women are not only hated by women, but men are even more hated

In the eyes of women, mysterious men are extremely charming, and their taciturnity can arouse women's curiosity even more.In the eyes of men, women's attractiveness does not only come from beauty.When you aspire to be as sexy as Marilyn Monroe, when you spend a lot of time trying to achieve the perfect body, when you endlessly look at your clothes or hairstyles, you may feel that you have enough You have the charm to attract the opposite sex, but in fact, you don't really know how to control the charm.

She is the executive CEO of an advertising agency. In her 30s, young and beautiful, her career is in full swing, and she is a true urban white-collar beauty.But she has been worried recently. After washing her face in the morning, the wrinkles at the corners of her eyes seemed to be one more than the night before, and the bags under her eyes were swollen like pandas because of staying up late. She was very depressed, and her mood seemed to sink to the bottom of the valley, sour.

Thinking back to my husband's attitude towards me recently, I feel that his attitude towards me is not as gentle as before. Is it because I am old and ugly, and my husband has begun to dislike me?She started to feel guilty and wavering. I was only 30 years old and I didn't want to be a yellow-faced woman so early. If my husband cheated, wouldn't I lose face?It's all about age.So the woman hurriedly asked the company for leave.Call your best sister to complain.After hearing this, the good sisters rushed over without saying a word.She comforted the woman: "Honey, you just don't pay much attention to makeup at ordinary times. A woman without makeup is like not wearing underwear. She has no sense of beauty. Do you still take those nonsense that water comes out of hibiscus and natural carvings are true? Which woman is now Don’t you have thick makeup on your face? In front of men, you still need makeup. Look at you, don’t you just have a little more wrinkles at the corners of your eyes and swollen bags under your eyes? It’s not a big problem. Let’s go shopping in a while and buy the best ones Cosmetics are back!"

The woman looked at her sister's face carefully. The skin was smooth and fair, without wrinkles or bags under the eyes.She excitedly said to her sisters: "I can't wait, come with me now."

In fact, a woman does not look old, but she lacks a little confidence in herself, although all women over thirty will have a fear that they will be replaced by a little girl.They will have a sense of crisis, which is a kind of spiritual depression.After all, time cannot return to Shaohua's youth.Because they are no longer young.Time is cruel.Even anything is in danger of being destroyed.Women's "face" has a fear of comparison at any age, and they are afraid of being compared.

She and her girlfriend spent a lot of money in the shopping mall, buying expensive brand-name cosmetics at all costs.When I got home, I was busy applying my face and making a mask.Then, for the final step, makeup.After all the procedures were completed, her face regained her youthful look, she looked young and cute, and the bags under her eyes disappeared.The skin becomes fair and smooth.She was as excited as a girl.

When the husband came back, he was taken aback, thinking he had gone through the wrong door, and said, "Are you my wife? How did you become so beautiful?"

She showed a cute smile and half-annoyed: "You are not wrong, because I put on a little makeup today. Do you like it?"

The husband praised: "You are very beautiful. Actually, I have always loved you very much." Her heart was sweet.

In fact, it wasn't that her husband had neglected her recently, it was just that he had a headache because of work matters, so he didn't notice that his wife looked a little tired recently. In his heart, she had always been so beautiful.

The next day, she and her husband went to her mother-in-law's house and sat down to eat because she forgot to put on makeup in a hurry.During the dinner, her husband said to her with emotion: "Look, it's great to be as beautiful as today, why do you look like a ghost all day long?" Unexpectedly, her husband's sincere words reminded her of the current situation. There was no make-up, so the woman put down the dishes and rushed directly to the vanity mirror in the bedroom, stroked her eyebrows, and wiped off her lipstick, leaving only a table of relatives stunned and dumbfounded.

In fact, most people don't like women with makeup very much. Thick powder is like wearing a fake mask.Women wear makeup mostly for men to see, but do men really like women's makeup?As far as I know, most men are disgusted by women wearing heavy makeup.Men like pure and natural beauty, and like to see women wear light makeup, not only can't be seen, but also more delicate than without makeup.

For women, beauty and charm are a kind of natural expression, not deliberate affectation.The real charm of a woman is not reflected in how fashionable the hairstyle is, or how sexy the clothes are, what matters is your self-confidence, naturalness and wholehearted love for life.

I once saw a woman returning from morning exercise on the way to work, about 60 years old, wearing white clothes, white pants, and white sneakers. His demeanor, wise and rational eyes all show his broad state of mind as calm as still water.Who can deny her elegance?

Being yourself and staying true to yourself is the key to attraction.Sincere care, listening, and comfort are enough to arouse your attraction to him; do not pretend or pretend in everything, let him see his own vitality; friendship with friends and harmony with family will also become a magic weapon to attract attention.

As a woman with a little vanity, how to avoid artificial misunderstandings?

[-]. Don’t wear heavy makeup

Heavy makeup is not uncommon in today's society. Although such a woman will give people a "refreshing" feeling, it looks like wearing a mask in the eyes of others, giving people an unreal and ungrounded feeling, and cannot really attract men. .Unless he likes to use you as an "actress".

(End of this chapter)