Calm women are the most elegant

Chapter 32 In social situations, maintain a calm and elegant image (3)
[-]. Don’t make gestures

Head scratching doesn't add to your sexiness, it just labels yourself as vulgar.In interpersonal communication, you must pay attention to your body language, do not have frivolous behavior and indecent movements.

Three, don't act like a baby

Fat hair like Zhiling's sister is also an achievement and ability, but if you can't use it in the right place, don't imitate it, and don't deliberately adjust your tone for the sake of elegance. Unreal things will not last long. Knowing that people have nothing, they will desperately pretend to be something.

6.Elegant women are usually fine-tuned, out of slowness

One morning, I had breakfast at a snack bar not far from my house. Not long after I sat down, I saw an old lady enter with a little girl.Upon closer inspection, it was a friend's mother and niece.The old lady didn't see me either, she just looked for a seat and ordered two small orders.I intentionally ate small bites, wondering if I should come forward to say hello?Or do you just pretend you didn't see it and leave after eating?

When I finished eating and got up, the old lady was also finishing eating, and bumped into the front of the door, unable to escape, so I had to softly call out: "Auntie!"

Auntie is half a head shorter than me. When she heard I was calling her, she raised her head slowly and looked at my face carefully, as if she was looking for some kind of sign.After a while, a smile appeared on his face.A series of careless movements of the old lady, like slow motion in a movie, unhurried, kind, and kind.When she left, she asked me to go to her daughter's house to play if I had nothing to do, and I promised.From the old lady's unhurried behavior, it seems that she has found what many women have always wanted, but they don't know how to look for it, something called elegance.

Elegant, always slow.

An etiquette expert said: "Women all hope that they can have an elegant temperament, and elegance is closely related to 'slowness'."

Elegant people can control their life and work rhythm in a "slow state".As small as a gesture of standing up and waving, as large as hosting a meeting and delivering a speech, different speeds give people different feelings.Fast indicates impatience and instability, while slow indicates confidence.Fast and slow reflect not only a rhythm, but also a habit and a state of mind.

The rhythm of walking, the speed of speaking, the reaction time of answering the phone, and even the magnitude of gestures are all quantifiable standards of elegance for etiquette experts.

Elegant women walk very slowly, they will always walk, never run.No matter how anxious she was, she just walked faster instead of running in a panic.They pay great attention to their walking posture and will never lose control because of anxiety.

Elegant women speak slowly.She doesn't speak faster because she's nervous, or raise her voice when she's angry.The elegant woman speaks 120 words per minute, and she speaks standard Mandarin.

Elegant women look very slowly.They don't keep blinking and blinking, and keep changing their eyes. She will slowly look at you, observe you, and face you with a soft, free look.

Elegant women sit and stand very slowly.Her movements will be reserved, not exaggerated or ostentatious.Whether she sits or stands up, she is slow and even.Moreover, the sitting posture of an elegant woman is often very ladylike and elegant. She sits on one-third of the stool, with her upper body upright, her gaze soft and straight ahead and the guests, without looking left and right.She doesn't cross her legs or sit there carelessly, she leans her legs gracefully to one side, making people look comfortable.

Elegant women also pay great attention to details.

Their clothes are dignified and generous.An elegant woman never dresses in outlandish clothes, she will be very discreet, generous, not baggy, not exaggerated and dazzling.Her clothes are always beautiful without being ostentatious, refined and not arty.

They drink things slowly, and don't gulp down.Elegant women always taste lightly when drinking, and drink gently and slowly in small sips, and they are definitely not unscrupulous gulps.

Eat without showing your teeth.An elegant woman is also very particular about her eating posture. She eats very elegantly. She eats in small bites and chews slowly without making any noise or filling her mouth with crumbs.

After holding a movement for a long time, she will slowly change the movement.If a person's sitting posture does not change for a long time, he will feel tired and deformed after a long time.When an elegant woman changes her posture, she will be very light and slow, making it difficult for people to notice.

The rhythm is slow, but the work is efficient.She pays attention to everything, arranges her work and life in an orderly manner, and has outstanding achievements.

You see, an elegant woman is cultivated by mastering the details. She will change with your accumulation of knowledge, experience, and life experience. She will keep pace with the development of the times and the advancement of society. .She will be strict with everything about herself, strive for perfection, and reach the realm of harmony and perfection.If you can do this, you too will become an elegant woman.

Unfortunately, in this era where "speed" and "number" are the quantitative standards, we are busy every day, in a hurry, and in a hurry.It seems that the earth will not turn without us; some things cannot be accomplished if we don't do them; there are so many benefits ahead, if we don't grab them, they will disappear...

If you are in a hurry, you ignore the details, and you will inevitably be rough, and you will not be able to touch the corner of elegance.Slow down to get better.Please let us slow down the pace of chasing for a while, and enjoy the beautiful scenery along the way carefully.If you are willing to give yourself a slow life, then you will find that even time is elegant.

Go for a stroll!Walking on the tree-lined path covered with golden leaves in the countryside, the sun shines on you through the thin leaves, mottled all over the place.A person quietly, listening to the wonderful ensemble of nature.You will feel that your tired body and mind have been released like never before, and slowly, you will fall in love with this elegance.

Go read slowly!Let the mind take a rest, open the long-stored famous classics, carefully read the various life styles revealed between the lines, slowly relax your mind, and add some warmth to the long-empty heart.From now on, be a happy scholar, learn to feel life with your heart, try to abandon those "shallow reading", and be a slow and elegant person.

Go slow!Owning life and enjoying every moment of it is the wise man of life.Just go slow and take your time.To get used to the elegance in slow life is to get used to happiness.

Slowness is a kind of elegant tranquility. Only by slowing down the heart can we better face the future and find a pure land in happiness.

If you want to slow down, you can slow down.Follow the ticking melody of the clock, understand the slow elegance, let life live out pieces of poetry, a little bit of poetry!
7.Don't lose your temper easily, it will only reduce your attractiveness

Losing your temper and being unable to control your impatience and anger are many women's communication barriers.Whether in the office, at home, or on the road, as long as you encounter someone or something that doesn't suit your heart, you will get angry and vent your bad emotions indiscriminately.Those who are yelled at by them may be their family members, their colleagues, or passers-by they meet by chance.

Anger, both on and off the job, can distort our sense of self and damage our important relationships.As far as I know, those women who love to lose their temper have tense family relationships and colleagues.When a woman is angry, not only does her face turn ashen, which makes her face look bad, but it also damages her physical and mental health.

The lethality of a bad temper is so great, otherwise why do many people say that the temper is gone and happiness is coming?

The key to a woman's grace and power lies in controlling her emotions.A person who can control bad emotions is stronger than a person who can win a city.If the water is deep, the flow will be slow, and if people are expensive, they will speak slowly.It took us two years to learn to speak, but decades to learn to shut up.Speaking is a kind of ability; not speaking is a kind of wisdom.Emotional control can become a complex problem if we lack the proper self-management skills.

How to get rid of the bad habit of losing your temper?
First of all, you need to know that the people who follow your tricks are usually the ones you love and love you.

People are used to bullying people who are good to themselves.Whenever we are upset, we like to lose our temper, and the objects of venting are often those who care about you and care about you the most. To put it bluntly, it is nothing more than relying on others to care about you to vent our emotions wantonly.People's hearts are fleshy, don't think that they don't know pain, don't think that they are numb and don't know sad people, their forbearance is just because they care.How can you bear to hurt someone who loves you like this?
Second, you need to know that losing your temper will not help solve the problem at all.

My husband used to be a "road rage" patient. When driving on the road, whenever he encountered poor driving, he would start to get angry and swear at others.Seeing him so angry, I thought it was ridiculous, and one day I burst out laughing, and he got even angrier, and yelled at me: "Thank you, you can still laugh, aren't you in a hurry?" I was calm He asked him, "But is it useful for you to get angry? If it is useful to get angry, why use the traffic police? Everyone can yell together. Therefore, you can only anger yourself and hurt me when you get angry, but the driver of the car in front , or the driver in front of the traffic jam didn't know it at all. In other words, the overall traffic situation will not be improved because of your anger, on the contrary it will be worse. So you think your anger is meaningful Is it? Also, if you are so angry, you can feel comfortable in your heart, but the question is, will you feel comfortable in your heart because of complaining and cursing?"

After hearing this, the gentleman nodded and said yes.Since then, he has never had road rage anymore. No matter how bad the traffic situation is, he remains calm. He drives as long as he can, and listens to the radio when he can’t drive, or chats with me or plays games.

Once you are convinced that losing your temper is harmful but not beneficial, and that it will not change the status quo at all, your "enthusiasm" for losing your temper will decrease a lot.

Of course, the most important thing is to find a quick and effective way to unblock it.

In fact, everyone will have times when they are upset, and everyone will also have a moment when they are tired, but few people can use the correct way to untie it. Some of them choose to endure, some choose to suppress, some choose to vent wantonly, and more Many people chose to vent their depression to the wrong person at the wrong time, causing irreparable losses.

In response to this problem, I consulted a well-known relationship trainer. He has a lot of experience in this area and has helped the bosses of some multinational companies.Here is his reply:

You can't avoid a bad temper.What you need to learn is how to release your emotions.

Most people try to control or suppress their anger.They never realize that anger can be dealt with.Simply suppressing our emotions, or suppressing our urge to get angry is not an option.Others can read our emotions—and sometimes better.Repressing our emotions is not good for us, because suppressing our anger will eventually lead to the expansion of anger.Either inward, leading to depression or disease; or outward, triggering many annoying habits.

We get angry not because of the incident itself, but because of our interpretation of the incident.This means we can choose how we respond to the person or event that triggers our anger.Anger is a natural emotion.The problem isn't anger, it's that we often try to justify anger rather than release it.To put it more plainly: if you try to justify getting angry, you won't get rid of it.However, most people know that it is not good to be angry or angry, but they cannot stop themselves from being angry or angry.

When people get angry because they can't control it, I ask them: Is there anything you can do to deal with negative emotions like anger right now?Most people can't answer.Some people's solution is to suppress their anger, or to vent their anger elsewhere.Some people exercise, and it helps, but not immediately.

I have learned a way to deal with negative emotions and have used it for over 20 years.Anyone can use this tool to deal with negative emotions "on the spot."

The way is this.Next time you experience negative emotions, remember to ask yourself this question: How am I feeling right now?You start by confronting your own feelings and emotions.Once you've done the work, silently declare to yourself: I don't want this emotion ever again!For example, when someone overtakes you on the freeway and dangerously corners you, your thought could be, "I don't want to be angry."Then, replace the bad emotion with a more constructive thought.In this way, you consciously choose a positive state of mind.In this example, your thought could be: I don't want to be angry, I want to be calm.

This method takes a lot of practice.At first, it may feel awkward.Practice it a lot and it becomes a habit, and you'll find yourself saying goodbye to negative emotions in just a few hours or even minutes.

Dear friend, if you want to control your temper, please try this method and let me know how it works.I know a lot of people are under a lot of stress right now.Many of you have a right to be angry.My advice is simple - find ways to change what you can, and try to make peace with what you cannot.Those who can be pried will be pried, and those who cannot be pried will be resigned to fate.

(End of this chapter)