Payback

I know your surname is Han. I barely swallowed the words that were about to come out. Frankly, I was a little perplexed. I remembered the boss’s suggestion that this fact was an absolute secret but I also thought that my behavior would look awkward. He did not miss my hesitation. 

“You heard that my name is Han Jay.”

His voice reached me like a cold wind that was mixed with ice cubes. Why was he acting so sensitive when he said his name? No, there was one more person who was like this. The boss also had a very unusual reaction while saying his name. However, no matter how much I wrecked my head, I couldn’t come up with a reason. And they both came across someone who could speak the name so casually. He asked again with a languid voice.

“Is this the secret that the boss told you before?”

“Why does your name have to be a secret?” 

When I asked back instead of answering, a deep smile with dimples appeared.

“Because it’s pretty.”

“Don’t joke.”

“I don’t joke.”

He repeated a phrase I had already heard many times and added softly.

“I hate this name.”

Was it just that? Because you hate your name because it’s pretty, and the boss was keeping it a secret? It was still strange. He should’ve seen my face full of suspicion, but he didn’t care and smiled mischievously as if something was interesting.

“So you better keep that name out of your mouth.” 

His threats were more effective than a thrust of a sword. As soon as I made a conclusion that maybe it was just because he was insane, the person with sensitive eyes reappeared. As soon as he came in, he opened his mouth to the madman as if he had prepared his heart.

“I never talked about you.”

He already knows it all. I quietly muttered the words that couldn’t come out of my mouth to myself. In this situation, it would be good for him to grasp the situation with his amazing reasoning ability, but his eyes, which were sharper than a hawk, must have had astigmatism. The madman pretended he didn’t know anything and smiled wide deliberately.

“I know. I just heard about it. He explained to you why he’s trying to get revenge on actor Song Yoohan?” 

“Mhm, that’s right. I thought his situation was a little pitiful. So I thought I might be able to help…”

“You must have wanted to link him up with a sponsor.”

The boss was startled, but he soon rejoiced.

“Yeah, that’s right! Haha, I was just thinking about that.” 

At the same time, he winked at me. As if gesturing that everything is going well. But the stumbling blocks were clearly visible in my eyes. By the time I thought about whether I should stop it, it was too late.

“Hmm, so I was just making an offer before you came in. If he wants to succeed as a celebrity and defeat Song Yoohan, then he needs someone who can compete with his sponsor… Hmm, for example, you…”

“He wants someone else.”

“Mhm, right. Not you— Eh?” 

Huh! The boss looked back at me, snapping his head with a faint sound of the wind.

“What?! There’s someone else you’re looking for? And not our Jay?!”

Anyway, I felt sorry for the person who was trying to help me, but I couldn’t hide the fact. No matter how much he stares at me with ferocious eyes as if he were looking at a traitor.

“Yes. There’s someone else.” 

“Who?”

“Dream’s Director Yoon.”

“…”

Was he shocked? He stiffened for a while with a blank expression on his face. I couldn’t help but admire Dream’s Director Yoon once again. Someone who could startle the boss even though he was the one who sees the madman next to me every day. What’s interesting was that could that person be someone more fearful than the madman who was grinning like an idiot right now? He’s someone I’ve never seen before, but he’s only getting higher and higher. As I was thinking, I heard a whispering question. 

“… Who?”

“Director Yoon from Dream.”

“…”

Silence swallowed him again. At this point, I was really curious about the person named Director Yoon. Someone influential enough to surprise the boss who was not even a company official like this. While waiting for him to open his mouth first, the boss’s expression began to distort strangely. He moved his lips as if to say something, then uttered a single word. 

“Who?”

Fortunately, I was not the only one who felt frustrated, so the madman helped me.

“Dream’s Director Yoon. Not me.”

The boss turned his stiff neck like a robot at him. 

“Not you?”

The madman nodded lightly and smiled brightly.

“He already knew my name was Han Jay.”

In an instant, the boss’s face turned white. My mind also went blank for a while. I could feel the boss’s eyes looking at me as if he were looking at a traitor, and I glared at the madman with similar eyes. There was no effect whatsoever. 

“Who could have told him my name?”

Ktf wjvwjc’r rboa nblmf uilvfv jibcu klatbea wlzlcu klat atf afcrf jawbrqtfgf.

“Q-ktb xcbkr.”

Ktf ybrr aegcfv tlr tfjv ab atf mbgcfg jcv jcrkfgfv lc j nblmf jr lo tf kjr yflcu ragjcuifv. Lf yjgfis frmjqfv atf olfgmf ujhf, yea tf ugfk wbgf ecmbwobgajyif lcafgcjiis. Cr tf kjr ufaalcu kbgglfv lo atf batfg qfgrbc kjr ublcu ab gfajiljaf, atf wjvwjc’r cfza kbgvr vgfk atf ybrr’r cfgnfr ab atf batfg rlvf. 

“I have already decided to introduce him to Director Yoon.”

The boss’s face was distorted, but it wasn’t an expression of concern or annoyance.

“You?”

“Yes. That’s why he started coming in and out of this place. Of course I get something in return.” 

“What is it?”

The boss’s question was directed at me. Looking at his furrowed eyebrows, I answered briefly.

“Me.”

During the conversation today, there were a few strange things, but the reaction of the boss that followed was the most difficult to understand. His frown slowly disappeared as he turned his face to the madman. But his expression was recognizable by anyone. He was barely hiding his grin. 

“Lee Baekwon decided to give himself… You mean you accepted the price? You?”

For a brief moment, the smile disappeared from the madman’s face. Conversely, an unbearable grin spread across the boss’s face.

“Hmm, if you agreed to help under that condition, I would be glad to cooperate…”

“No need.” 

“Then I’ll just cheer…”

“No thanks.”

“I’ll just watch…”

“Mind your own business.” 

“…”

The madman cut off the boss’s words to the extent that the person listening next to him felt embarrassed. The boss had a brief snowball fight with him, but soon raised his lips again. He smiled, revealing his teeth, as if nothing could sour his happy mood.

“Fine, alright. Well, you know, I’m so busy that I don’t have time to be concerned about you.”

Then he gave me a fierce gaze at the end of his words. His message was clear. 

-I will meddle with you instead.

I would rather have the madman retaliate his words earlier. It was only when he was driven out of the room that he took an unwilling step out the madman’s room. Wouldn’t it be troublesome with him in the future? A moment of worry came to mind. However, he needlessly noticed it right away. Then he covertly raised his thumb up and whispered.

“Don’t worry. I’m actually not busy at all.”

——— 

Five volumes. That was the number of scripts I read while he was away. Now I have to start a new book, but I stopped at the first chapter. To be honest, I was tired and sleepy. It was a long day, and there were so many incidents. Perhaps I had adapted to the madman’s office, I sat comfortably on the sofa and immersed myself in thoughts for a long time. In my head, the manager’s drooping shoulders and Hansoo’s tears soaking the floor, the three I saw in the practice room, and Myeongshin’s face were mixed together.

I needed manager Choi. And the manager needed Hansoo. The reason my manager accepted me was because there was Hansoo, an actor who was worthy of his ideal. Because there was Hansoo, he unideally took on an actor like me. So, if Hansoo collapsed, the manager would also collapse.

Hansoo’s camera phobia was a weakness to be taken advantage of by Myeongshin at least once anyway, so it may be a good thing that he suffered in advance. The key was how long Hansoo would hold out. Surely he didn’t completely break down, did he? I mean, it was just the beginning.

Because of this problem, the yellow-haired and good-looking guy who will be openly monitoring me in the future, wasn’t too much of a concern. Maybe that’s why, it just felt like the two of them were well-fitted as one piece in my ever-changing plan. If Myeongshin uses those two, I could do the same as well. Unfortunately, that will be a story for later. 

I came to this industry, had taken only a few steps, and then stopped again, but there was no rush. Rather, it was nice to have obstacles in the way. The goal I had to reach was a long way to go and the steep road that took my breath away was welcomed. Knowing that as long and hard as it was, my anger will grow stronger and revenge will be certain. I was used to enduring a time of pain. Maybe I wanted that pain.

“Is the first chapter that boring?”

I came to my senses with the sudden question. Oh, it was the madman. Realizing that, I looked at the uninteresting scenario that I had been holding on to for a long time, and then turned my eyes to him. I thought he would have something to say because of the conversation with the boss, but when he came in, he turned on the computer and started doing his own thing as if I was not there.

“Don’t know. Didn’t read it.” 

When I responded, he let out an indifferent voice while staring at the monitor.

“Shall I remind you? That that is the only thing your useless self has to do.”

If the words contained ridicule or belittlement, I might have gotten angry and defiant. However, his words were dry as if he was talking about the scenery of everyday life, and the coolness filled the interior. As I glared at him quietly, I heard a question.

“If you’re mad, then take the initiative to increase your self-worth.” 

“I thought my worth was enough just by staying by your side, who is afraid of working alone.”

I was being sarcastic, but he smiled and accepted it casually.

“Not enough. I’m still scared to death.”

I was startled, so I responded after a while. 

“…Would you like me to draw a talisman on your body?”

“There is something better than that.”

With a glance, he turned his eyes from the monitor and looked over my body with languid eyes.

He glanced at me with languid-looking eyes. 

“I think I’ll feel better now if you crawl on the floor and suck my dick. I’m already suffering from a lot of blood down there.”

I frowned and said, ‘Don’t be ridiculous.’ What kind of nonsense was that? I glared sharply, but on the contrary, he took his hand off the keyboard and leaned his back comfortably on the chair.

“Don’t believe it? You know it because you’re a man. Since the person who turns me on is in the same room, it’s natural for me to imagine stripping him and doing all sorts of things in my head. The most thrilling thing is to knock you down and violate you while you glaring at me with those eyes. In this office.”

His dry voice, which he uttered as he stared indifferently, gave a small chill for a moment. This insane bastard. My body was tense and on alert. Unknowingly, I tightened my fist, but he turned his eyes to the monitor as if he had something to do. 

Tap, tap, tap.

I could hear the occasional typing again, but I still couldn’t take my eyes off him. I’ve never imagined being someone’s sex object, or in the weaker position. To the point where I doubted that he’s just trying to scare me. If this is correct, his intentions were somewhat genuine. It was for a moment, but I felt intimidated. What was I thinking like an idiot? I was annoyed with myself and leaned my head on the sofa to cool off, but after a while, I heard another question.

“How many did you read?”

I opened my eyes and wondered what he was asking about and turned my eyes to the scripts stacked on the table. I looked at it and said, ‘Five.’ 

“What was the most worth reading?”

“Third.”

When I answered without hesitation, he turned to the monitor. I was actually expecting him to ask this question. I was preparing an answer in advance because he always asked this. Even if that wasn’t the case, the third scenario really was interesting and time flew by as I read it, for the first time. The content was better understood because the format of scripts that consisted of only lines had become familiar. As I anticipated his question, of course he knew I would have prepared an answer. Sure enough, it was for the ensuing question that he turned his eyes to me again.

“Did you watch that movie?” 

“It came out as a movie?”

He smiled slowly. A smile suited him well. And if a guy has dimples, when he smiles, he would be cursed at for being unctuous, but it’s annoying because his smile doesn’t feel that way. But the smile still made me uncomfortable. It’s because it was like I was looking at a mask that’s been perfected over a very long time. Maybe I’m one of the few people who can’t smile when he smiles? Or the only one.

“It did. It was a massive failure.”

My eyes went straight to the table. I had piled up what I had read so far on the table to categorize what I had read. His explanation seemed as if I had given the wrong answer, so I recalled the other contents of the piled-up scripts. However, even thinking about it, except for the third one, everything else was boring. Then I heard a slow explanation in my ear. 

“The actors were not suitable.”

I looked back and he still looked at me with an interesting glimmer in his eyes.

“The lack of publicity also played a part, but even though the actor’s face was known, it wasn’t the kind of image that could represent the movie. The biggest reason was that the acting was like shit.”

I suddenly wanted to see the movie. It’s a pretty fun read, but could the actor ruin the movie? But his next explanation was a bit surprising. 

“At first, the script was forced to be changed, and then an actor who couldn’t act ended up leading the movie. That’s why the director is going to quit after shooting his current movie.”

The script changed? Ah… I just remembered what I had read before. The whole story got weird with the sudden ending. So the rest were all written by the same person? A question arose, but the feeling was different. While I was convinced, the topic turned to the script in which I stopped in the first chapter.

“That’s the last film the director wants to shoot.”

The one that was being filmed now? I stared at the script in my hand as if I were seeing it for the first time. I think the scenario with the changed ending would be interesting if it remained the same. Of course, that was just my personal taste but if a person like me who was an outsider in this industry was interested in it, wouldn’t that mean it was a good work? 

However, it was a bit of a waste that it was the director’s last work. Of course, since I had only seen a script with only lines, I didn’t know what it would be like if it was changed to a video form… but I paused after thinking about this for a while. Perhaps it was because I had practiced reading the lines for several weeks, and for a moment, a script that had only been thought of as letters on paper suddenly popped out in three-dimensional form in a blurry way. Then I remembered a movie with a similar feeling that I had never known before.

“The first short film I saw.”

It felt vague, so when I spoke up to here and stopped, he waited for my next words with an expressionless face. I reminded him of the short film that I pointed out as being worth watching some time ago and asked.

“Was it by the same director?” 

I was prepared to be ridiculed if I was wrong, but what I heard was completely unexpected.

“You’re really not boring.”

“What?”

“It means you’re cute. Not only do you work hard on those thoughtless tasks that I asked you to but you also sometimes show a surprising instinctive hunch.” 

I looked at him with fierce eyes. Yeah, I had thought that he had just been thoughtlessly making me read those scripts. However, even when someone was glaring at him enough for him to want to step back, he smiled more as if he was elated.

“I told you those eyes excite me.”

Fuck. I cursed and tried to get up from my seat. But he took off his glasses and mumbled first.

“I’m going crazy because I want to fuck you.” 

“I can kill you.”

He tilted his head to the side as he spoke lowly.

“Sometimes, empty-headed punks try to rebel against me. People who can only see my outer appearance.”

He smiled as if to tell me what his outer appearance seemed like. 

“Even after getting to know me, no one really glares at me like you do. So you understand?”

“Understand what?”

“How much I’m restraining my temper and indulging you.”

Looking at the smiling guy’s face, I spat out lowly. 

“So what if I thank you for indulging me when I’m useless?”

“It’s okay. Because you’re cuter than I thought, so I’m satisfied too. If you said you could suck my dick like any other guy for revenge, I’d force you to do it and kick you out of here.”

The words ‘any other guy’ reminded me of the room where I was deceived by the yellow haired. If I hadn’t thought of any other way, perhaps I would have knelt down in front of those middle-aged men with belly fat and sucked on their stinky genitals. Just like the madman said.

Come to think of it, why doesn’t that guy not want to use those other people without any feelings? It is clear that he was also in need of revenge. Perhaps my troubles were revealed in my expression, as I met his gaze, a cold smile fell on his lips. 

“Don’t worry. You just need to be by my side. I’m the one who will connect you with Director Yoon.”

As he said that, the heat inside of me suddenly washed away as if I had been hit by cold water. Come to think of it, it was a problem that needed confirmation.

“Are you sure? What exactly is your relationship with Director Yoon?”

“We’re close enough. Rather, how are you going to seduce Director Yoon?” 

“It’s none of your business, so don’t worry.”

As I snapped, he smiled with dimples.

“How can I not care? You already agreed to give yourself to me, but if you say nonsense like giving yourself to Director Yoon again, won’t I be offended?”

“Saying such nonsense once is enough for me too.” 

“Then what are you going to do with Director Yoon?”

“…”

“I’m asking how you’re going to lure him into being a sponsor.”

I should’ve just skimmed over it, but I hesitated. He was quick-witted, so if you give him a little bit of time, he’ll find the answer, so I shouldn’t say anything. However, it was not possible, and the other party did not disappoint this time as well. He narrowed his eyes and looked at me, and spoke out my true intentions. 

“You… don’t have any intentions of making him a sponsor?”

“…”

“So it’s like that.”

He concluded that definitively even though I hadn’t said anything. I sighed inwardly, repeating the regrets I had already made many times. I shouldn’t have been involved with this guy. 

“Tell me. I will keep the secret.”

I opened my mouth reluctantly at his prompt.

“… That’s right. He just has to look like my sponsor.”

“Are you going to cheat your way?” 

“Yeah,” I said, and he narrowed his eyes.

“You’ll get found out right away.”

“I know. So I need to do it well. I only need to fool one person once at the right time.”

Only one person, Myeongshin, needed to be deceived. All I had to do was find the right time, even if it takes a long time. I had to work hard to build up the stage that I could only go through once. This was the best plan I could do with no other cards on my hands. Wasn’t that natural? There was probably no other man who would like me except for the madman who had unusual taste, so I had no intention of seducing Director Yoon in the first place. 

I wasn’t a girl dreaming of becoming Cinderella, nor an aspiring celebrity with a fanciful ambition to become a star via a sponsor. All I could do was dig traps with all my might and deceive others. So I could be mistaken for an aspiring celebrity who managed to grab a powerful sponsor and became Cinderella.

It was a very simple plan, so I prepared in advance for fear of being ridiculed, but strangely, the madman just stared at me with an expressionless face that I couldn’t read. He let out a low voice as the long silence became burdensome.

“You really intend to succeed.”

Wasn’t that obvious? It was absurd to hear that after a good while. 

“Do you think I’m a fool who runs around wildly without thinking?”

“I thought so. The revenge you’re trying to get is like banging your head against a brick wall. You are nothing after all.”

“…”

His eyes narrowed as he looked at me. 

“But there’s something attractive in that. I like you more and more.”

I frowned sharply because I was in a bad mood, but he smiled regardless.

“Fine. I’ll really help you.”

It was a serious voice, so it made me feel worse. Because it meant that he was openly saying that he was playing with me in the past. 

“Stop pretending to be benevolent. After all, you’re using me because you need me.”

I had no intention of groveling to him since I already knew that he was targeting Myeongshin’s sponsor. Of course, he didn’t even bat an eye.

“There are many people who can replace you. But you have no one to replace me.”

“If I hadn’t met you, I would have found someone else.” 

“Who?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows slightly.

“Who knows, anyone in their 70s or middle-aged with a belly who wants their dick sucked.”

When I answered indifferently, he twisted his lips.

“Anyone huh… But for your plan, you must become close with Director Yoon right? Go to Dream and ask anyone. I wonder if there’s anyone who can greet him. I can do that. I’m the most crucial person.” 

He added with a smile.

“That’s why, seduce me. I will fall for it.”