The Stars In Your Eyes

Last night felt like a dream for Bai Yutang. He could not differentiate which one is real and which one is his own illusion. All he could remember is he stupidly cried last night because he could not contact Jian Ge.

It seems like Jian Ge held him and kissed his temples and his forehead last night? It seems that he also holds Jian Ge back? It seems that he cried again in Jian Ge's shoulder? But how did he awoke in his own bed this morning?

It was already 8 o'clock in the morning when he finally opened his eyes and still can't decide which one is reality and which one is his dream. Bai Yutang knows he needs to make breakfast, but he is still dazed in his bed.

If it was only a dream, why did he dream about holding Jian Ge tight like he doesn't want to let him go?

If it was not a dream, then what will Jian Ge think about him?

This was the first time Bai Yutang felt something like this, and he was very confused. He doesn't know what to do. After ten minutes silently dazed staring at the ceiling, he finally woke up and slowly opened the door.

Whether it was just a dream or reality, he's staying here for free and he already promised to prepare breakfast everyday..

Bai Yutang didn't see Jian Ge in the living room. Now he was confused, maybe it was only a dream, and Jian Ge didn't go home last night. He checked Jian Ge's shoes, and it was there.

It means Jian Ge is still sleeping. It seems he really came home very late last night. He must be very tired.

Bai Yutang decided to cook something light. He was thinking maybe Jian Ge had a birthday party last night and got drunk. So he made gingered lemon tea too.

While he thought about maybe Jian Ge got drunk and had a party without him, he felt a dark feeling silently creeping inside his heart and turned his mood into sour. He knows he's a bit weird lately. Maybe he will try to search on the internet. What kind of disease he has.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder? Maybe his father's death had a bigger impact on his mental health more than he thought.

While Bai Yutang boiled the egg, Jian Kang Lu already woke up and looked at him cooking. He still felt remorse inside his heart, regretting his irresponsible act last night.

Bai Yutang felt like someone was watching his back, so he turned around. When he saw Jian Ge's face, his heart beat faster again.

He abruptly turned back, and lowered his head, tried to focus his eyes into the eggs instead. He really really really doesn't understand. What the hell is happening with him??? He turned into a weird person.

Then Bai Yutang felt his hand enveloped by a warm touch. Jian Ge holding his hand and looking at him. Bai Yutang could not raise his head to see Jian Ge, nor let go of his grip. Five parts are feeling shy, five parts of him also feel he doesn't want to let his hands go.

Bai Yutang felt his face is hot, he definitely won't raise his head up or else Jian Ge will see his face blushing red like a monkey's butt.

"TangTang, can we talk?"

This is the first time Bai Yutang heard Jian Ge's regretful voice. His voice is low, and nervous.

Bai Yutang could only nod his head. Then Jian Ge led him to sit in the chair in the dining room.

Jian Ge slowly explained about last night. Why he didn't call Bai Yutang, nor why he can't answer the calls.

"I'm sorry to make you worried, TangTang. It's my fault. You have every right to be mad and disappointed with me. But I really hope you can forgive me. I could not promise things like this won't happen again, but I'll try my best not to repeat this irresponsible act of mine."

Then Jian Ge said, "Can you forgive me?" with a pleading voice and anxious face.

The whole time, Bai Yutang could not raise his face. Not because he's mad. When he heard Jian Ge's explanation, he even felt like he was very childish, foolish, and stupid. But he can't help but be relieved, and glad to know Jian Ge didn't intend to abandon him. He wasn't mad at him. Didn't forget him.

Bai Yutang could not raise his face because he's too ashamed, and his heart was still beating so fast. It won't calm down at all!!! Especially when Jian Ge holds his hand all the time when he explains what happened last night, and sometimes Bai Yutang also feels those soft fingers caress his own.

So he could only nod and hide his red face.

Jian Kang Lu was relieved to see his kitten nod. Even though he could not see his kitten's expression, at least his kitten didn't seem mad with him. At least not as mad as he imagined. He's really afraid his kitten left him because of his recklessness last night.

"What can i do to make you feel better?" Jian Kang Lu asked.

Suddenly Bai Yutang remembered the cake he made, and he didn't say happy birthday at all! He abruptly raised his head.

"Jian Ge, happy birthday. I didn't intend to say it late, I thought I wanted to surprise you. But I'm sorry, I should say it early yesterday's morning instead of delaying it."

Bai Yutang shamelessly didn't want to admit that he actually forgot. Anyway, Jian Ge made him wait last night, so it was break even.

On the other hand, this is truly a big blow to Jian Kang Lu. He regretted last night even more. His kitten already spent so much effort to celebrate his birthday, but he let his kitten down. He even felt more guilty right now.

"Yes… It doesn't matter. I'm sorry TangTang. Did you still allow me to taste the cake?"

Bai Yutang nods, and takes the cake from the refrigerator. He actually didn't know how this cake was placed inside the refrigerator again. Maybe Jian Ge put it here last night.

He put the cake on the dining table, and remembered the candles. Where the hell is it?

"I bought candles too, but I don't remember where i put it last night." Bai Yutang honestly admits it, even though his face is burning from shame.

Jian Kang Lu stood up and took the candles from the drawer in the living room. He gave it to Bai Yutang.

Bai Yutang arranges and lights it. He said, "Happy Birthday, Jian Ge. I hope your wishes come true, and you'll always be happy."

Jian Kang Lu looked at his kitten. Inside, he was thinking. 

'My wishes already come true, and you make me very happy. I do hope we can stay like this. Together. Until the end of time.' 

Then he blew the candles.

Bai Yutang prepared the breakfast, and they ate the breakfast and the cake as dessert together. Bai Yutang's mood already brightened, especially when Jian Ge praised his home made cake and told him no one ever made a birthday cake for him before.

When his kitten asked him about the patient last night. Jian Kang Lu hides the fact that Zhang Min is actually his ex lover. He only said Zhang Min is his colleague and his father is one of the teachers he respected the most.

Jian Kang Lu then said, this morning he still needs to go to the hospital. He is already a bit late, but it doesn't really matter. Jian Kang Lu offered Bai Yutang to go with him, and later they can have lunch together outside, and go outside. Where ever Bai Yutang wants to go.

Jian Kang Lu feels afraid that if he left his kitten alone again this morning, he will come back to an empty apartment again. Afraid his kitten will run away from him, disgusted with him.

Bai Yutang was tempted, he remembered how devastated he felt last night because he could not contact anyone to ask Jian Ge's whereabouts. But he feels uneasy. He didn't feel confident enough with himself. Why does he have to feel confidence to go to Jian Kang Lu's place of work? He also didn't know.

"Do you still have work to do? Or if you don't want to go to the hospital with me, it's fine. I'll pick you later to have lunch outside."

Bai Yutang hurriedly shook his head. He really feels weird today. What's going on with him. He finally surrendered to his own desire. And as usual, following Jian Ge's suggestion. He can't let Jian Ge go back to the apartment just to pick him up.

"Okay, Jian Ge. I'll take a bath first."

Bai Yutang was really glad that Jian Ge bought him clothes last week. At least he won't look so shabby. He wears his new clothes and shoes. Even though the clothes are a bit loose hanging in his skinny body, it still raises his appearance from miserable into acceptable. He actually already gained a bit of weight from his regular meal during this time he stayed with Jian Ge, but it was still not significant enough.

Jian Kang Lu drove happily to the hospital. This is the first time he's going to work accompanied by someone he likes. He doesn't know that just going to work with his kitten could make him so happy like this. He glanced multiple times to make sure that this is not his illusion.

He feels like a true genius lately! He just suggested Bai Yutang to accompany him because he felt guilty leaving Bai Yutang alone yesterday, and afraid his kitten would run away from him. But who knows that this actually made him very happy instead.

But why does his kitten look nervous?

When they arrived at the hospital, Bai Yutang was confused, where should he wait? In the car?

Jian Kang Lu answered him, "You could follow me and wait in the nurse's station. Or you want to wait in the cafe inside the hospital?"

"Is it okay for me following you, Jian Ge?" Bai Yutang is really nervous now.

Jian Kang Lu smiled, "Of course, why not? You won't interfere with my visit, and it's not like you want to steal patient's information."

Thus the residents who were already nervously waiting for their Living Buddha, who late for the first time ever in their Saturday morning round, saw this skinny young man who they never saw before following their Living Buddha.

Doctor Jian never brought someone before. His brother? Cousin? Medical faculty's student?"

Jian Kang Lu straightly introduces them shortly. Introduces Bai Yutang to the nurses also, and politely asks them to accompany Bai Yutang while Jian Kang Lu does the morning round.

Usually doctors never bring someone to their ward visit. Sometimes they bring their children if they can't let the children alone at home. Very rare, they bring their spouse to introduce them to their working environment. But for doctors to bring their young friend, the nurses and residence never saw this happened before.

The residents don't care, as long as their Living Buddha came and prepared them for the hellish Monday round. Gossip can wait. Now they need to hold this Living Buddha thighs first. And not letting him run away before they squeezed everything.

So Bai Yutang left there, answering the nurses wave of questions. Sometimes he peeks at Jian Kang Lu, and his admiration for this outstanding man just increases even more. He could see Jian Kang Lu is really smart. He's also very good at explaining things, and all of them here look like they really admire him too.

After thirty minutes, when Jian Kang Lu had already gone to visit the patients in the ward with his residents, one of the young nurses asked him, "Did you ever meet Doctor Jian's girlfriend?"

Bai Yutang shook his head, "All i know, Jian Ge is single. I never saw or heard he had a girlfriend."

Somehow, he suddenly hates this nurse. He can see that this nurse looks at Jian Ge with a yearning look. And he also doesn't like to hear Jian Ge have a girlfriend.

"It's weird, lately Doctor Jian seems to be dating a lot. His today's outfit also looks like he'll be going on another date later." Said the other young nurse.

Now Bai Yutang hates both of them. "Mmm.. Never heard Jian Ge said he wanted to have a date before."

"True true, I think it's already been one year? Doctor Jian never reveals his Chang'e Goddess name or looks, but sometimes he says he wants to have a date with his Chang'e Goddess." The number one nurse Bai Yutang hates answering her friend.

Now Bai Yutang is also curious, how come Jian Ge never mentioned he wanted to go on a date? He always said he was single and didn't have anyone to accompany him. Did Jian Ge lie to him? Or Jian Ge lied to these girls? Bai Yutang can't help but ask, "When is the last time Jian Ge said he went to date?"

The nurses seemed to ponder and tried to remember, the other nurses said behind them, "I think it's already months since Doctor Jian went on a date. Lately his face is not as bright as before. Maybe he already broke up?"

Bai Yutang didn't know why he felt sour and glad at the same time. He really didn't like to hear a thing that he doesn't know about Jian Ge. He thought Jian Ge was honest with him, but how if he really has a girlfriend?

Even though he doesn't know why, he is glad to hear that Jian Ge already broke up. But why did Jian Ge have to lie to him? In either way, he really doesn't like to hear the words Jian Ge and girlfriend together in one sentence.

The number two nurse Bai Yutang hate was said, "Yeah, I guess you're right. Maybe almost half a year ago is the last time Doctor Jian wore his date outfit like today."

"Mm.. I remember now. The last time Doctor Jian said he's going with his Chang'e Goddess is months ago. I remember I asked whether he's having another date and Doctor Jian said he will have dinner later at night with his Goddess in Korean restaurant. I remember because I tried that Korean restaurant Doctor Jian recommended with my boyfriend the next week. And it was really good!" The other nurse popped up from behind the desk.

Bai Yutang was curious, and asked "What is the restaurant name?"

"It was B restaurant in the T building." The nurse answered.

Now Bai Yutang is stunned, so Jian Ge also takes this girlfriend to the restaurant they like? Bai Yutang remembers he treated Jian Ge there in May before he was having his final exam. But why does he feel something weird here?

Bai Yutang asked again, "When is it? May?"

"I took a photo there, wait let me check. The nurse said. Then she rummaged through her mobile phone, and said again, "I was going there in the first week of June, so yes Doctor Jian's date is in May. How do you know? So tell us, is Doctor Jian still with his Chang'e Goddess or broke up already? Oh.. How i wish they could make it. Which girl doesn't want to be Doctor Jian's lover?"

Now Bai Yutang is really speechless. Why he has a premonition that the Chang'e Goddess they talked about is… Him???