Too Broke For Afterlife

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Behind the metal door lies a huge factory hall. Hundreds of imps stop for a second and turn towards us before they continue running around, following their work.

An endless conveyor belt leads to dozens of huge furnaces which are connected to wires hanging from the ceiling. On the left side of the room I can spot doors labeled 1, 2, 3 and so on.

Stan opens his arms, smiling proudly.

"This is the heart of Heleskov LLC, the place where the souls of humans go after they have died."

"But…"

I thought I would be seeing dead people being burnt alive and stuff but holy, was I wrong.

"So the imps are the souls?"

I watch one of them controlling a furnace, their humped back and hairy ears make them look more like a caricature than a soul. Is this what my future looks like?

Stan raises his eyebrows. "No, those are my workers. They exist for the sole purpose of working. They don't have souls."

Okay, phew. I've never been a fan of factories and working in one for all of eternity seems even worse than staying alive. 

We walk over to the conveyor belt and when I see what is being transported, I can feel my heart stumble.

Stan looks at me and speaks calmly. "I think you've seen this before."

Oh, I have.

The conveyor belt is carrying materialized souls.

Grey cotton balls that are no bigger than an adult's fist. 

"But…"

The image makes me feel sick but I can't look away. I was one of them for a hot second. And I really didn't enjoy it.

"Once a soul enters Hell they get stripped from their karma points. We sedate them, materialize them and then burn them to produce energy."

I stare at the helpless rain clouds and watch how they disappear inside the furnace one by one. The imp standing next to it is counting the souls.

"The machine…"

"Yes, the Materializer was a special production for Heleskov LLC. We have about 60 of them."

Stan turns to the counting imp.

"Numbers?"

The imp doesn't look up. "Very bad. 0.00003% decrease since last month."

That's all they say, completely focused on not miscounting.

Stan sighs. Suddenly, he looks stressed and turns to me.

"You see, this is the problem, Parker. Over the last few decades the number of souls sent to us has kept declining. And because of that, we don't produce enough energy anymore."

"Energy for what?"

He nods. "Of course. Let's drive to the fan."

The way he says  the fan  makes me shudder. 

The demon motions me to follow him and we leave the factory hall to step outside, the curious eyes of the imps in our backs.

As soon as we are out the door, the heat punches me in the face like a baseball bat.

I look down at myself. Hey, I'm still alive. No flames.

Apparently this suit does work. Maybe Stan should start selling his DERF fabric on Earth. He'd be able to line his pockets nicely.

That's an idiom Isabella has taught me. It basically mans earning a fortune, just so you know.

Thinking of Isabella, I feel a bit homesick. How long will I have to stay down here? 

Stan's lava like voice rips me out of my thoughts.

"It's a mundane job but I love it. I mean, just look at what I've built!"

I turn around to look at the headquarters from the outside and with its many floors, hallways and roofs it definitely looks fancier than it did inside.

It's a huge building. Way too big for a single demon. After all, most workers seem to reside in the factory hall.

Next to the entrance, golf cart-like vehicle is waiting for us to get in, behind the steering wheel is another imp of course. 

This one is even darker than the others I saw in the factory, only a few spots of their skin still look orange. The rest is of a dark purple.

"Question. Why do the workers have different colored skin? Do they reflect their jobs or the hierarchy?"

Stan puts on a pair of sunglasses. "Good observation. And you're not even that wrong. The more heat you face, the darker the skin gets. This one works as a driver so they are always outside."

"And you're blue because…"

"I am the boss, I sit in my office most of the day."

"I see. So if I was to stay here for longer, would I become orange as well?"

Stan shakes his head. "Of course not, you're a human. Your skin color reacts to sunlight, not heat."

The golf cart drives us away from the factory and through the orange canyons. The further we drive, the bumpier the ride gets and after a few minutes I see something appearing at the horizon.

It's gigantic and made of metal.

Like an alien it stands out from among the rocks.

"Is that…"

"The fan, yes."

The closer we get, the more I can feel the temperatures gradually dropping. 

The ginormous fan is floating in the middle of Earth's core, spinning around its own axis. If I had to guess I'd say that it is probably a couple miles tall.

And then I feel the wind, pushing us back.

"We have to stop here, he can't get closer or it will blow us away," Stan tells me while side-eyeing the imp. 

They stop the golf-cart in front of a sign reading  Danger, no trespassing without proper equipment!  and we get out.

I watch the giant construction with awe. Never have I sen something this impressive before. But it still doesn't make sense to me.

"So you burn souls to produce energy for this fan? But why?"

Stan takes off his sunglasses, examining the construction.

"To cool down the planet and keep it at a consistent temperature."

My eyes narrow as I try to comprehend the information.

"But you aren't getting enough souls for the fan which means…?"

Stan looks at me surprised. "You've never heard of climate change?"

Climate change?

"The fan isn't working efficiently and with that the Earth is heating up. The pole caps are melting, whole cities get flooded, there are forest fires." He waits for a reaction from me but I don't know what to say.

"Come on! If even I know about this stuff, the one guy who has never been on Earth before, then so should you!"

"No, I know about climate change but it is caused by the thinning ozone layer letting through the sun more."

Stan stays quiet. Then he bursts out into laughter.

"The sun! Holy shit, that was a good one."

His bellowing vibrates in my ears and I cross my arms in frustration.

I've always hated being laughed at, especially when I am right.

"You think the sun is causing this? Seriously?"

"No, humans are because of the gases we produce!"

Stan rolls his eyes in amusement. "You guys really think you can control everything, huh? No, Parker. Humans have nothing to do with it."

"Really now?"

"Yes."

"So why are there less souls? Humanity is growing and people still die normally, right?"

Stan nods. "It's a bit more complex than that. Not everyone who dies goes straight to Hell."

He takes a long look at me, as if he wants to say something important. But once again he holds back just smiles.

"You look dehydrated. Are you thirsty?"

Actually, I am. This heat is worse than any Texan summer and my throat has dried out completely. I'm hardly able to hold back from coughing each sentence.

"Yes, please tell me you guys have water."

"Very little but enough for a mortal like you. Let's go back and have lunch together, I'll explain the rest to you there."

He puts his sunglasses back on, gets in the golf cart and I do the same.

"You eat? I mean, aren't you dead?"

"I was never alive to begin with. And usually I don't eat but when I have guests it's just appropriate, isn't it?"

The imp starts the golf cart and with the push of the fan in our back, we rush back to the headquarters.

"I hope you like soup?"

"Sure."

I rest my arm on the windowless door and watch the red rocks that rush by.

Now in all honestly, Hell is kind of beautiful. A bit monotone and monochromatic but also completely different from anything I've ever seen before.

How will I even begin to describe this place to the others once I'm back on Earth's surface?

That is, if Stan keeps his words and lets me leave.

He said he won't keep me here but I still don't know if I can trust him.

But do I have a choice?

My eyes close as I take a deep breath, wishing this was just a dream and I could be at home with my friends.

The crystal in my pocket weighs heavily.