I, the first son, became a woman

The beating of the heart, the weight of each breath, the crackling in the brain seems to be repeated by dozens of people.

All of this, after everything is silent, is so clear and so pure.

Xia Juan forgot how long he had just sat quietly.

Until the light outside the window goes out bit by bit.

Until even the faint moonlight disappeared without a sound.

The whole world seemed to be completely plunged into a never-ending darkness.

Xia Juan was like a part of this darkness.

If possible...

I stay in this darkness forever, no one can find me, no one can see me.

How good should it be? !

A bitter smile was slightly outlined in the darkness that no one could see, and stuck stiffly on his mouth.

Xia Juan felt itchy on his face.

Something was constantly flowing on the lips, with a hint of salty taste.

"I didn't cry..."

"Manly man, I... am not those delicate women."

In the darkness, with a sob, Xia Juan raised his hand and touched his wet face.

She once thought that she would be persecuted by her parents and her family.

But the fact is that although parents want to accept their own daughter body, they will not force themselves too much.

Xia Juan thought that he escaped a catastrophe.

She thought that she could just continue to muddle along like this.

Just muddle along and muddle through your life!

man?woman?

What does it actually mean to her? !

As long as she doesn't care, then...it's not a big deal.

It's just... If you let her get married, let her accompany another man...

That's simply not possible!

I, the young master of the Xia family, when will I put on my wedding dress and commit myself to other men? !

My dignity, my self-esteem, my nobility, my arrogance...

Are all my proud and heartfelt emotions and characters going to be trampled on like this? !

get married?get married? ! !

No... I absolutely don't want to!

I would never allow myself to marry another man as a wife.

Because of that, it would be an unprecedented humiliation for me!

In Xia Juan's thoughts.

She is an upright man, but she is forced to marry another man.

It is indeed so unacceptable to think differently, and even prefer to escape by death.

but……

"But I don't even have the right to commit suicide..."

"If I escape from the Xian Dynasty, I will stay away from all the troubles."

"Then father and mother, eldest sister and the others... will definitely suffer even more terrible disasters because of me."

My family is what I care about most.

And the only thing that matters.

It is impossible for Xia Juan to escape, nor is it possible to commit suicide.

That's right, now I really don't need to marry that dog emperor Qi Chenlong.

but……

In order to help me out of the sea of ​​suffering, my eldest sister could only lie to Qi Chenlong in desperation, saying that I was going to get married.

In other words.

Within two months, I must do what my eldest sister said, I must get married!

if not……

Otherwise, the eldest sister is the crime of deceiving the emperor!

At that time, the whole family will also be implicated.

In a way, it actually seems...

Both options are the same.

It's just that one is passive and the other is active.

In fact, Xia Juan understood.

Whether it's my parents or my eldest sister Xia Feiyan.

Their thoughts all hope that Xia Juan can accept the body, get married and start a career, and marry a good husband.

So they would rather marry Xia Juan to someone with a good reputation in advance.

The son of a promising family lived a stable and happy second half of his life.

He also didn't want Xia Juan to be taken into the harem by Qi Chenlong in such a sloppy way.

Then a life of tragedy.

Just like those ladies of the family in the past.

Once you reach the age to leave the cabinet.

Their parents will carefully select some young masters and sons of aristocratic families who are of good quality and well-matched.

In the end, the two families married to make a marriage.

Instead of joining the deep palace like the eldest sister, intrigues and fears all day long.

If you don't pay attention, it will even lead to disaster, and all the families will be executed.

Xia Juan has always been smart, how could he not understand? !

She understands the good intentions of her parents and eldest sister.

She also understands that her family is for her own good.

in fact……

If she was really a daughter from birth.

Why is there such entanglement and pain now?

Or.

In fact, for most aristocratic women.

Finally, find a good husband and son-in-law who are well-matched, and live a stable life.

Isn't it a good thing to do? !

But unfortunately, I am a "halfway monk".

Even a year ago, he was still a man.

Although a crippled man.

But at least...

18 years of life and the infection and acceptance of worldly vision and environment.

Xia Juan is doomed.

It is impossible to accept it in such a day or two.

The huge capital city of the Xian Dynasty could not be built overnight.

But now, Xia Juan's heart is being persecuted again and again.

The choice again and again caused it to fall apart and fall apart!

She... seems to have no choice.

Marry... It seems that you must marry!

Or……

Even if Xia Juan didn't want to, never wanted to.

But for parents, for sister, for family.

She must be married!

We have to rush the ducks to the shelves, and within two months, we will make a decision!

And... she doesn't have any chance to escape.

There is also no way to reverse and dodge.

There is no way out for myself...

A ray of dawn outside the window slowly pierced the night.

Xia Juan's eyes trembled a few times, feeling the tears wet her eyelashes, she couldn't help blinking a few times sourly.

She turned her head and looked at the faint light on the window sill.

The whole person just felt a burst of exhaustion and fatigue.

She is sleepy.

However, she dared not go to sleep.

If she can't sleep, it is naturally the best result for her.

But for everything she wants to protect.

But it was just a disaster.

What's more... What she is most afraid of now.

It's just that when I woke up, I found that I had already put on my wedding dress and was about to marry another strange man.

This...seemed like her last moments.

The true self belongs to her alone.

Belonging to that man's body, man's soul, the last time of Xia Juan.

After a whole night of sleepless nights and crying, the redness and swelling of the eye sockets became very obvious and could not be concealed.

Xia Juan blinked, raised her arm and wiped it casually.

"Marry... good!"

"I marry... I can only marry!"

"But who to marry..."

"I have to decide for myself!"

Chapter 584 Choosing a Husband

Early in the morning, the maids had prepared hot water and towels for Xia Juan to wash.