Natural beauty, inspirational nature

Chapter 79 A Long Handwritten Letter and Five Masks
During that fateful relationship that ended without a cause, I was wronged but had nowhere to vent. I was holding back in my stomach, and I really felt that my depression was about to come out.

So I decided to tell Xiaoyu my true feelings in the oldest way of writing a letter.Because other than that, I don't have any other way to contact him.

When I picked up the pen and started to write, every time I wrote a paragraph, tears would not fall down, and the letter paper was wet several times.In the end, I had to discard it as a draft and re-transcribe it again.The content of the letter is as follows——

Little fish:
Zhanxinjia!The message your girlfriend sent me at 2:28 am that day shocked me and hurt me so much!Because I never heard of you having a girlfriend.

We met on a dating platform. You dated me as a single, and you also told me that you don’t want to have a relationship right now. Anyone who gets close to you, anyone who gets closer to you, You will be very uncomfortable, so I always thought that you were traumatized in love, and you were unwilling to accept a new relationship because of the shadow in your heart, and even wanted to heal your emotional shadow and psychological trauma because of this, I never expected When I realized that you actually have a girlfriend, I would trust you unconditionally no matter what you said, and I never doubted that you were not a scumbag.

If you don't like me, I can give you up, because loving someone doesn't have to be forced. If you don't want to receive my messages, you can also block me directly, block me directly, why do you want to mobilize people to stab me like this? break my heart?
I really don’t know if this passage was sent by your girlfriend, or you made it up yourself in a girlish tone. If it was sent by your girlfriend, I can only say that the behavior of sending messages on your boyfriend’s mobile phone at two or three o’clock in the morning is too scheming. I must have been in my sleep at that time, and I was deprived of the right to justify my name.Blocked me because she finished posting
I want you to tell your girlfriend:
First, I don't know that you have a girlfriend. You have always been single and chatted with me, and never told me that you have a girlfriend.

Second, if I know that you have a girlfriend, if I kill me, I will not be able to send you any information, let alone wait for you for half a year.

Third, whether I like you or appreciate you, even if I fall in love with you unknowingly, I don’t need her to “thank you”, because it has nothing to do with her, because I don’t know her existence at all!
Fourth, suddenly telling me that I have a girlfriend is already very infuriating and shocking, and you want to tell me where you are chic and happy, to stab me?Sorry, I am not obligated to make myself unhappy in order to ensure that you have a pleasant trip abroad, and I am not obliged to wrong myself for not sending messages in order to escort your love, because you are the one who deceived me. I don’t want to be in love and prefer to live alone First of all, I didn't know that you had a girlfriend and went to provoke you first. I hope she understands that there is an essential difference!

Fifth, there is no need for a third person to intervene in the matter between us. You should communicate with me personally and clarify it!I know what to do, I don't need her to tell me what to do.

Not to mention that I had already decided not to send you any information at that time, even if I wanted to, the unhappiness between you has nothing to do with me, and it cannot be regarded as my fault.It can only be said that you caused it!
It’s enough to make it clear that you have a girlfriend, why did you tell me specifically when you went on a trip, isn’t this just throwing salt on my wound and making me die of pain?Why should your happiness be based on the pain of an innocent third party?
If you really have a girlfriend, and the message was sent by your girlfriend, please be sure to convey my response to her above, and give me justice!I also hope that you can take good care of your girlfriend in the future, take care of your mobile phone, and don't come to harm me again!If there is a second time, I am not so easy to bully.I don't need to ask for anything in return, but my feelings are not cheap, and it doesn't mean that you can look down on me, or allow a third person who appears inexplicably to bully me at will.

I liked you at the beginning because I thought you had a good character, a calm and stable personality, and you would not judge people by their appearance. I admired a beautiful, kind, upright and brave soul like me. I never thought that you would be so dishonest and cause me to be "innocently tortured". The great humiliation has brought me a psychological shadow that will never be erased in my life.

If you have difficulties, it is because your family and parents object, so you have to make up information yourself and want to cut off contact with me, you don't have to play the image of a scumbag to hurt others and hurt yourself. That's all for now, isn't it?

You treated me in this way is too unkind, and it hurt my heart too much. I hope you can reflect on yourself and give me a sincere apology!

I hope you understand that the relationship between us is equal. It doesn’t mean that today I like you, I am divorced, you are single, and your family’s financial conditions are better than mine, so you think you are superior to me and superior to others. I hope you will not There is such a wrong cognition that people are born as human beings, born differently, have different family backgrounds, and have different experiences!

All people are created equal, there is no distinction between high and low.The true nobility is always the nobility of the soul, the nobility of character, and has nothing to do with your so-called "family background" or "circle class"!

If you really have a girlfriend, you should focus on falling in love with her wholeheartedly, and block me completely.My principle and bottom line is never to be a third party in other people's emotional world, no matter how much I love, I will force myself to give up.

But if you don’t actually have a girlfriend, but you have to give up dating me because your family and parents object, I hope you can think about whether your feelings for me are friendship or love. If you love me, please love deeply. If you don't love, please go away.

I hope you can make a decision. The epidemic is severe. We always feel that tomorrow will be tomorrow, and there are so many tomorrows, but we don’t know which will come first, tomorrow or the accident.

Each of us doesn't have much time to waste. I want to love the one I love well, and I am willing to become a better person for the love in my heart.Accompany him to work hard for each other's dreams, accompany him to be filial to his parents, have children, and build a happy family with him.

How I wish that person is you, but that is only my wish.If you really don't have me in your heart, and you don't want to cross the secular world, cross classes with me, and go to the future firmly and bravely, then please block me completely, there is no need to turn around every step of the way, and secretly pull white on my WeChat account from time to time My circle of friends makes me feel that you still have me in your heart, which makes me even more unable to let go of you and the relationship and fate between us.

……

This is the gist of the letter. At that time, I was full of depression, and I wrote a full six or seven pages, with snot and tears, writing while crying, and writing for several days.

There is love, hate and hurt between the lines, but it is never humble or overbearing.I accept the rejection of my confession, I accept the fact that I am broken in love, but I cannot accept the harm and humiliation of being innocent.

After finishing writing, I wanted to send the letter, but due to the impact of the epidemic, the express delivery in my hometown was stopped at that time, and only the post office was still open. My mother asked the people at the post office for me. They said that the current epidemic situation is serious, and the letter is estimated to take ten. It can be delivered to Changzhou in about a day.

This is the first time I have written a long letter to Xiaoyu. I don't know if he has returned to China, when he will return to China, and when he will receive my letter.I don't know anything about the real situation on his side.

At that time, the domestic epidemic situation was gradually brought under control and improved, but a large-scale outbreak began in Japan.I can only rely on my strong intuition and sixth sense (since I met him, for some reason, my sixth sense has become more and more accurate), guessing that he may have returned to China long before the outbreak of the epidemic in Japan, Back to my hometown Changzhou.

I carefully folded the handwritten letter, put it in a plastic bag with a zipper and sealed the zipper.

On Valentine's Day, the circle of friends was reposting photos of bouquets made of masks, causing everyone to sigh and envy.Because masks have become a global shortage of resources in the short term, people all over the world are worrying about not having masks to wear when they go out. At this time, medical supplies are basically used on the front line of the epidemic. The general public, no matter whether they are poor or rich, believe that It is difficult to buy masks in a short time.

"We will build what the country needs!" This is the collective voice of Chinese entrepreneurs, which makes people excited. Since January, in order to meet the huge demand for masks that has suddenly increased in the market, some manufacturers of automobiles, home appliances, and mobile phones in our country have "switched" to the production of masks, and quickly invested in this global fight against the "epidemic".These powerful manufacturing companies did not hesitate to join the army of mask production.

I clearly remember that during the most difficult days when the masks were in short supply, my mother began to "operate" with a pile of towels at home. She cut the towels into small pieces, and then quickly folded the towels in half with a needle and thread Thread, and then sew elastic thread on the ear hanging places on both sides of the towel.

My mother heard that I was planning to go back to Changzhou to find a job in those few days, so she searched for a long time in the physiotherapy room in the garage downstairs, found a few masks in stock, counted them several times, and there were only 15 masks in total. You need a mask when you go out. Take it with you. We are fine. I made a 'spare mask' these days. I read the news today. The government has issued important instructions to speed up the resumption of work to increase the production capacity of masks and increase the supply of masks. At present, various places are Going all out and increasing production day and night, I believe China will soon be able to resume normal supply of masks."

I insisted on keeping a few for the family, and I said, "Your homemade spare towel mask is basically useless. I gave it to me, what do you do? Dad wears a mask at least in the hospital, and you can't go out without any effective protection." .”

In the end, my mother agreed with my suggestion, and carefully stuffed 10 masks into my hands. Holding the 10 masks, I felt like I had found a treasure, so I carefully put the masks in the suitcase and kept them. stand up.

When I was packing my luggage, looking at the thick stack of letters on the desk, I suddenly remembered that when Xiao Yuer and I first met, Xiao Yuer told me: my nearest relatives and friends sent too many letters. Fruit, I'm about to throw up, I can't finish it no matter how much I eat.I joked: I like eating fruit the most. If you can't solve it in the future, I will share half of it for you, so that you will be more relaxed.

The OS in my heart at that time was actually, I like you so much, as long as you don't dislike me, I want to share with you the future life, no matter the ups and downs.

But we had just met at that time, and I was afraid that if I said such warm and emotional words, I would scare the other party.

But there are likes and loves in this world that can be "self-acquainted" like that, as if they have known each other for a long time, and want to treat each other well for no reason or condition.Even if Xiaoyu is not from a wealthy family, but from an ordinary family, my affection for him will still not be discounted.

And when I got 10 masks, the first thing I thought of was Xiaoyuer, and I wanted to give him 5 of them.

I don’t know why, but subconsciously, I seem to have decided that he is the only boy in my life who I want to protect unconditionally. No matter whether he chooses me or not, even if there is only friendship left between us, I hope he can live a safe and healthy life. Over the epidemic.

It is said that a friend in adversity sees the truth. I wish Xiaoyu could understand the profound friendship contained in these five masks. I want to tell him that even if there is only a bowl of gruel left between me and him today, I will have no hesitation. Give him half a point.

I sealed the 5 masks together with the letter in a plastic bag and planned to mail them to Xiaoyu together.

My mother went out to buy groceries in the morning, because the family can only send one representative to go out, so I asked my mother to help deliver the courier.

My mother looked suspiciously at the thick pile of things in my hand, and asked me: "What is it? Where is it going to be sent?"

I said, "I have already written the address on this piece of paper. You can't open the letter inside to read it. I have already sealed it in a plastic bag."

My mother gave me a blank look and said: "Who cares to read what you wrote? These days, I saw you sitting there mysteriously writing and writing. You wrote to this kid, right? It's just that you are soft and soft inside." It's bulging, it doesn't look like it's just stuffed with letter paper, so you're giving away all the masks I gave you, right?"

Sure enough, I knew my daughter, Mo Ruomu, and I blushed and stammered and said, "Yes, but not all of them, so I gave five of them. Oh, mom—don't ask who he is. Anyway, this letter is right. It's very important to me, really very important, please! You must help me send it safely!"

"No, you don't have the phone number of the other party when you mail something, and the post office doesn't send it. Don't you know?"

How could I not know, but helplessly I don't have his phone number, so I can only ask my mother to write the recipient is his name, but the cell phone number left is the cell phone number of the doorman uncle.

Afterwards, I sent a message to the doorman uncle, asking him to receive the courier and hand it over to Xiaoyu.

The doorman uncle didn't know what the relationship between me and Xiaoyu was. When replying to the message, he didn't forget to ask me: Cheng Damei, I would like to ask, what is the relationship between you and that Yu Qingyuan?
I replied frankly that he and I were just "friends".Some things were sent from my hometown, specially for him, and I hope my uncle can help me deliver them by hand.

My uncle didn't refuse. I can't tell outsiders what happened between me and the boy I like, and it's even more impossible for me to tell outsiders. In addition to the five masks, this express delivery also has a long handwritten letter full of bitterness and tears.

(End of this chapter)